Weight

Our baby girl left the hospital weighing 7lbs. At the first appointment, on her fourth day, she weighted 6lbs 10oz and the doctor wanted us to come in again in a few days to weigh her again. Next time, she weighted 6lbs 9oz. I was freaking out and almost started to cry at the doctor's office. The doctor informed me that we were doing everything right by the amounts of wet diapers Ariela had, but that we should try to increase the amount of milk/formula she was getting. Since I don't have enough milk, we give her some formula as well. Since we starting feeding her more, she was less fussier and slept better. If only I knew that it was all that we needed to do.

At the last appointment (last week), she weighted 7lbs 15oz. Yeay!!!

Birth Story

After we got admitted to the hospital at 3:30 on November 15, things moved relatively fast. We settled in our room by 4:30 and I got hooked up to the external monitors for baby's heart rate and my contractions. I didn't want to get the epidural right away since then I would spend the rest of the labor in bed. So, Mr. V and I decided to go walk around. He called our parents to let them know that we finally got admitted while I was stopping every few minutes and waiting for the contraction to be over. We walked for 25 minutes and came back to a room where I was again hooked up to the monitors. The nurse (who was also a lawyer as we later found out) was very nice and answered all of our questions. The doctor who was on duty that night wanted to break my water to speed things up. I decided to get an epidural at that time and only after let them break my water. The anesthesiologist was supposed to come within 30 minutes. I kept telling myself that 30 minutes should be a piece of cake after couple of days of that pain. The hospital had couple of emergency c-section and I had to wait for my drugs. After an hour of waiting, I was done. I was so ready to be poked. I was tired and exhausted from the pain. I kept looking at the monitor every time I had a contraction and I would see the numbers around 110-120, those were some painful cx.

Finally, the anesthesiologist came in. Mr. V could stay in a room but he couldn't watch what they were doing, he had to face me. I wasn't afraid of the needle. I was more afraid of getting a painful cx during the procedure and not being able to move. And that is exactly what happened. As the guy was poking me in the back, I had to sit still through a cx. I squeezed the pillow and listened to a nurse who was telling me I was doing great and that it was almost over. And indeed it was over after 10 minutes. I got comfortable in my bed and the nurse asked me if I was feeling cx at that point. I was surprised she asked me that since she could see from the monitor that I didn't have one yet. But I was wrong.
Nurse: Honey, can you feel the cx?
Me: What cx? I didn't have one yet.
Nurse: You are having one right now.
Me: Really?...shocked face...pause for feeling stupid and not getting the epi earlier.

The anesthesiologist told me I did great and that they could use me for taping the procedure, since I didn't move an inch and didn't even peak. He told me that he'll be in the hospital all night to which I answered "me too" :) I guess I was feeling better if I decided to joke.

I was told that things could slow down after the epi. They checked me around 6 and I was at 4cm. I was a little bit upset for not making more progress. The doctor and the nurse started talking about giving me Pitocin to move things along. They told us that our families could come around 5-6am and meet the baby not earlier. I was getting for a long night while Mr. V stepped out to the store to get himself diner.

Around 11pm, they said my doctor wanted to deliver my baby (it made me feel great that as busy as that woman is, she wanted to be there for us), so they decided on not giving me Pitocin and wait till morning when Dr. G would come in. They checked me again around that time and I was 6cm dilated.

We got a new nurse after 11pm, she wasn't very talkative but she was still answering our questions and doing her job. At 1am, she came in and checked me. I couldn't read her face. I thought she was going to say that I was still at 6cm and not making any progress. She looked at the monitor and then said that I was at 10cm and ready to push. Wow, really? What a reality check it was for me. I started shacking uncontrollably and my fever went up to 38 degrees. She prepared the room and got everything ready for the baby. Then we did couple of practice pushes. Mr. V was holding one leg and the nurse was holding the other. I didn't know if I pushing or not, since I couldn't feel anything. But after couple of pushes the nurse called the doctor and told her we were ready for her. Everything was happening so fast that I couldn't believe I was about to meet my baby girl. We had to wait for the doctor for about 20 minutes, she was finishing up a c-section. After she came in, we did another couple of pushes (three at a time) and my baby girl was born. Mr. V cut the cord and they placed her on me (now originally I wanted them to clean her first, but at that point I just wanted to see her).

She was absolutely perfect and the most beautiful baby. She was very clean when she came out even Mr. V didn't expect her to be that way. She cried for couple of minutes on my chest while I looked at her and cried. The nurse took her then to clean, measure, and weight her.

Mr. V had time to call my parents and his brother before we started pushing. They wanted to be at the hospital at any time night or day to meet our baby girl. It was great to see my parents and to know that my BIL and SIL were there too and on time (they are always late) :)Our room was filled with joy and laughter as everyone was looking at Ariela.

Ariela was born at 2:14am, weighted 7lb 6oz and was 19.5 inches. We came home after spending two nights at the hospital and were learning from each other ever since.

Sunday

Yes, we were still at home and I was still pregnant. I was in such pain that I had to stop during the contractions and bend a little and swing my body from one side to another. I was still timing the cx and they were getting stronger and closer together but still not enough to go to the hospital. We called the hospital twice at that point. I wanted them to tell me to at least go to the hospital and see if my baby girl was doing OK in there. But each time they told me that my contractions had to be 5 minutes apart and lasting for about 45-60 seconds.

We finished installing the car seat in my car, it was the last thing we had to do. Mr. V joked that our baby girl was waiting for us to be all done with the preparations and that she would come out when we were all ready. So, at 1pm we were all ready. My parents were calling us every hour to check how we were doing. Everyone was anxious at that point. My mom was worried and kept telling us to keep calling the hospital and see if they would admit us.

Around 3pm my cx were about 6-7 minutes apart and lasting for about 40-70 seconds. We called the hospital again and this time they said we could come in! I really wanted them to monitor me and tell me that our baby was doing OK. I wasn't hoping that they would admit us and I was already mentally preparing myself for the inducement the next day.

We got to the hospital at 3:30pm but left the bags in the car, since I was sure they would send us home. The nurse put the external monitors on me and checked me and I was 3cm dilated. I coudln't believe it. After 20 minutes, she said my cx are about 5 minutes apart and that they were getting the room ready for us. Mr. V kept asking the nurse if we came at the right time or we should've waited a little longer. The nurse informed us that some people come a little later and some come when they feel the first contraction and not even dilated. At that point, I wasn't listening to what they were saying and could honestly careless :) I was excited, scared, shocked, anxious at the same time. I coudln't believe we were so close to meeting our baby girl.

Couple more days

The next day I woke up at 5am and couldn't fall asleep because I was having period style cramps (which later I learned were contractions) every 10-15 minutes. Everytime I was close to falling asleep, I would get another contractions. I stayed in bed for a little longer and I was able to fall asleep. That day, Friday (I really didn't want her to be born on the Friday the 13th), I was sure we were going to go to the hospital later on. In the evening, Mr. V downloaded the application on my iphone to time the contractions. The cx were all over the place, anywhere from 10-20 minutes and lasting for about 30-40 seconds. So, there we were, sitting on our couch, watching TV, and timing the contractions. On Saturday, I woke up again at 5am, but in more pain. I couldnt' fall asleep anymore, so I moved to the living room with my iPhone and started timing again. Again, I thought that this was the big day. So, we finished packing the hospital bag, went for a walk with Mr. V, and went out to diner to a Chinese restaurant. I was praying my baby girl would come after 12am. The contractions were all over the place, anywhere from 8-15 minutes lasting about 30-40 seconds each, but they were definitely more painful. The Saturday went by and yet again our baby girl wanted to teach us to be patient.

40 weeks 1 day

I had to do the NST test since I was overdue. Baby and I passed after 25 minutes. I've been feeling a bit crampy that day so I asked the nurse if she could spot any contractions and she said I just had a little one and that is it. I was a bit disappointed since I thought that after passing the mucous plug (gross) a day earlier, I would have some signs of labor. But I guess my baby girl had her own schedule and we all had to be just a bit more patient.

Catching Up Post

Well, I again didn't update my blog for a while now. I think I'll go back to being 37 weeks pregnant and update from there.
37 weeks appointment I had my first internal exam and so far no progress, except the doctor did say my cervix was soft. As usual, they checked the heartbeat, urine, and weight. She also checked if the baby was still in the right position and apparently she thought my baby girl was breached at that point. She sent me to do the u/s and the external version if necessary. My appointment for EV was scheduled for the following day. I was worried about the procedure and the stuff that I've read online didn't help either. At that point I wanted to agree on a c-section if the baby was breached. Mr. V came with me and they started with the u/s and guess what? My baby girl was head down just like she needed to be :) I was sooo happy and relieved. I also had the NT test done and we passed after 25 minutes.
38 weeks appointment No progress, checked heartbeat, urine, and weight
39 weeks appointment Not dilated, cervix a little bit more thinned out. Checked for heartbeat, urine, and weight. I asked the doctor what will be the plan if my baby girl wouldn't come on her own. She said we still have time. Babies usually come a week before or after the EDD.
40 weeks appointment Not dilated. Checked the heartbeat, urine, and weight (which at the end of the pregnancy was 164, that is 40lbs of gained weight, ehh)We finally talked about the plan. She informed me that she didn't like her patients to go over 41 weeks, so my induction was scheduled for November 17. Mr. V and I were supposed to go to the hospital the day before to start the induction process. At that point, I remembered that when I was setting up my appointments a few months back, I was kind of laughing about having an appointment for 40 and 41 weeks. I was so sure that my baby would come early, but apparently she had a different plan.

Grey Hair

I think the name of the post says it all. Yesterday I walked in to the ladies room at work. Now I usually don't spent a lot of time in that place, just do my business and get out. But this time it was different. I was glancing at myself in the mirror when I noticed something white in my hair. I took a step closer to see what it was. I was shocked. I am thankful nobody was in the bathroom at that time, otherwise that would hear my "oh no, really? this can't be". I pulled the hair and just stared at it for a few seconds and then threw it away. I decided not to stress about one grey hair, because stressing would only lead to finding more of them.
Fast forward to today's morning, I was done blow drying my hair when I noticed something white again. Guess what it was. Yes, another grey hair. I just hope it is not going to be like this everyday now. Hopefully, tomorrow will be a "grey hair free" day.

One Year Older

Well, I turned 27 years old this Monday. Mr. V and I had plans to grab lunch before his work trip to Boston. But as it turned out we didn't have time for breakfast together, so forget about lunch for sure. Our downstairs bathroom was leaking and it was either fixing it that morning before Mr. V's trip or waiting for a week and let our garage be full of water. So, Mr. V spent around 3 hours taking the tile off,used a special paste to hold the tile, putting tile back on and cleaning, while I was finishing his packing and making him some food to go.
Honestly, sometimes I wonder if he really works with computers all day long. If I didn't know, I thought he works in construction. He had all the tools and materials to fix the bathroom. He said it was his first time working with the tile but he did such a great job that I think it looks better then before. Maybe I should start calling him Mr. Fix It All. This is usually how it goes in my family, I break something and Mr. V fixes it. Although, in this case probably for the first time, it wasn't my fault that the bathroom was leaking :)
I drove Mr. V to the airport and since I had a day off, I headed back home. Later, I visited my close friend. She got a really good cake that we started eating without having diner first. I also received flowers and a balloon from another close friend. I felt like I spend half of the day on the phone accepting birthday wishes. It felt great that people remembered and cared. And in the evening, my family and I went to diner. Overall, it was a good birthday, I just with Mr. V would be there to celebrate it with me.

My Hero!

Yes, Mr. V, this will be about you.
On Friday after work, I was on the way to pick up my mom for some grocery shopping and during the whole ride all I could think about was the Godiva chocolate drink that I've had a long, long time ago. So, I picked up my mom and told her that we have to stop by at the Godiva store to satisfy my first craving (I really didn't crave anything before, so that was something new and something I just had to have).
I walk in to the store, look at all of the delicious candies, but I still want the chocolate raspberry drink.
Mrs. V: "Do you still carry the Chocolate Raspberry drink?"
Sales girl: "Yes!...pause... but we are all out of cups."
Mrs.V: "No cups at all?" I started looking behind the register thinking I could spot one cup that was somehow lost from her sight and only I could find it. I was crushed since this was my first craving. I tried satisfying it with the chocolate raspberry truffle that I usually get but that just didn't hit the spot.

Mr. V called me when I was going back home with the groceries and I told him about my craving and how it was ironic that the first time I really wanted something I coudln't have. Anyway, I get home, kind of forget about the drink and wait for Mr. V to get home to have diner.

He gets home 45 minutes later (even though he said he was 10 minutes away from our house when I talked to him on the phone). I was in the kitchen heating up diner for us. He said he had something for me and walked with me to the living room. And what do I see on the table?????


I couldn't believe my eyes! So, I grabbed couple bites of my diner and relaxed on the couch with the best drink ever! Thanks Mr. V for being so understanding and thoughtful!

Doctor's Appointment

I had my bi-weekly appointment with the doc yesterday. The nurse as always took my blood pressure, asked for a urine sample, and also asked me to step on a scale. Now, I was mentally preparing myself all morning that the number that I will see will not make me happy. Plus I was behaving myself at work. Co-workers brought donut wholes and cookies in the morning and I only had one little donut whole thinking that I just added one more pound to the cruel scales. So, I take my shoes off and step on a scale. A moment of quietness.....I see 147lbs..... Um, how much did I weight at last appointment? The nurse looked at my folder and said 154 lbs. Well, how is it possible that I've lost 7 lbs in two weeks? So not possible!!! She informed that scales are different in all offices and that is why it is hard to tell how much I really gained. Well, I come back to work, thinking about those 147lbs and also thinking that I am OK in the weight department, I stuffed myself with two more donut wholes and a cookie :)

The doctor asked me if we attended the Birth Class and I said that we bought the DVD instead and will watch it before next appointment. I don't think I blogged about the classes she recommended. If you sign up for two classes you get a package deal that costs $400. I know we live in Bay Area and things are way too pricey, but I'd rather spend $45 on the DVD that will cover the Birth Class and hopefully we can live without the Taking Care of a Newborn class. We thought we could put that $400 to a better use, let's say a stroller!

So, now I've got homework to do before next appointment. I also have to decide on my leave and talk to my employer.

I hope everyone has a great weekend!!!

Updates!

Some of my family and friends are going through rough times. I couldn't even bring myself to write all about it and don't even know if I want to bring these sad thoughts up again.....I hope they'll find the strengths to go through this. They know I am always there to listen.

On our news, Mr. V and I decided to get a 3d/4d u/s. We first scheduled it for this upcoming weekend but then after reading couple of different websites we wanted to get it sooner since the babe could be moving to a fixed position and we wouldn't be able to see anything but her behind, that is assuming she would turn and would turn in the right away. I know, i know, too many assumptions, but I didn't mind getting the u/s done earlier and seeing our baby girl again.
The u/s tech gladly changed our appointment to last Saturday and we were on our way. When we got there, I was a little skeptical since I expected seeing a nice office, sort of like doctor's office. But this office was part of the private studio for yoga/relaxation/massage. There was a small TV for Mr. V to look at and a comfy couch for me. The guy was making comments about how Mr. V asks a lot of questions and tries to be a perfectionist. That is not news to me at all, I am kind of used to him :) Finally, after couple of minutes of searching for our baby girl's face, he changed to 3d and we were able to see our beautiful, baby girl. I couldn't stop starring at her. It seems like she changed a lot but at the same time some of her features stayed the same. She was sleeping and had her hands close to her mouth and at one point was sucking on her finger. Mr. V moved and sat next to me on the couch, we glanced at each other and we were both smiling but then had to turn back right away so we wouldn't miss any extra seconds of seeing our sweet baby girl.

We left the office after 30 minutes with a DVD and the pictures will follow in the mail. Mr. V was glowing and smiling for the rest of the day and saying how beatiful she was and how you could definitely tell she was a baby girl and not a baby boy because her features already looked feminine. Now, everyone who knows Mr. V would think that the person changed 180 degrees. You would never hear such words from him. But I knew this baby would change him and bring out his sensitive side. Couple of weeks ago, he was kissing my stomach (and you baby girl) and said that he was already in love with you. He rarely says the L word to me, but I can definitely see that things are about to change. Mr. V and I are soooo in love with you! Let's stay healthy for the next couple of months before we meet!

The Fall is Here

I can't believe it is already September. We haven't even had summer yet in San Francisco and now it is time for fall. I just hope we'll get some sunny days in September before the rainy season will kick in.

As weeks go by, sometimes I feel like they are flying and other times I feel like they are dragging. Every week I get the updates with the baby's developments and also how my body is changing. I swear, I find new symptoms after each of those weekly readings. As they mention what I may expect this week, I seem to have that symptom in couple of days.
So far I've had:
More bathroom breaks (day and night)
Heartburn (never knew what it felt like before 3 weeks ago)
Back pain (started about 3 weeks ago)
Vivid dreams (throughout pregnancy)

For this week, I've read that PG ladies usually get hemorrhoids around this time. I guess I should be on the lookout for that.

I am back!

I am back from our getaway. I can't really call it a vacation since I didn't get any rest at all. I think I spent too much time with the family. For some reason, people thought that the cabin was mine and I had to be a hostess. They kept asking me where everything is, like I know.

It is too hard to decide on anything and everything when you have 10 people involved and a baby. The fam couldn't decide between going to the lake and driving to the points of interests in the Yosemite. Since I didn't really want to pull a swimming suit on my enlarged behind, I was all for going for a drive and seeing the surroundings. It took almost 2 hours for people to argue and decide on a drive. By the time they decided some were already irritated. The baby gave up and fell asleep :) Anyways, I think we've learned our lesson. Next time, we'll just go alone or with another couple.

My brother and SIL told us their amazing news. She is PG!!! They told us as we were going to see one of the waterfalls in Yosemite. At one point it was just us, them and my parents and they decided to spill. I knew they started trying again and I was sure it would happen pretty fast for them. I am crossing my fingers for a healthy niece/nephew.

Now, I am back to work. I feel like I need another vacation after this one. Maybe Mr. V and I will be able to go somewhere for the weekend in September. I would love just to spend some time just with him and of course, Mrs. A, with you too, I didn't forget about you!!!

Two more days!

I've got two more days until our little getaway to Yosemite. It is Mr. V's birthday this Sunday and this year we decided to rent a house and invited our families to spend the weekend there. We had this plan last year but we never went.

I have some packing and cooking tonight and tomorrow, and then on Friday morning we are heading down to Yosemite. I think we'll be the first one to arrive with Mickey and then MIL and FIL will come. My parents and bro and SIL and BIL, SIL, and nephew will come in the evening. I am not looking forward to pull a swimming suit on my arse, especially since both of my SIL are smaller then me now. Well, I always felt uncomfortable in the swimming suit and now it'll be even more obvious. Oh well, I have to find a cover-up and just wear that on top.

I've been so tired in the last couple of days. I've been getting relatively enough sleep, except I wake up around 5:30 every morning to go to the bathroom and then I fall asleep for another hour and it is time to get up again. Turning from one side to another is like a big task now. I feel like I need to come up with a plan first and then start turning carefully with my body pillow. Every time I turn, I hope I won't fall accidentally of the bad when I turn and/or wake up Mr. V, poor guy doesn't get much sleep lately.

Two more hours and I get to go home!!!

Test Results

Last Thursday (at 27w1d) I had a day off and decided to do the glucose test since I was up early anyways. I went straight into the lab, drank the stuff that reminded me of orange flavor Gatorade, and made myself comfortable for an hour. The drink wasn't that bad actually. It did taste like it had a lot of sugar and concentrate in it. I usually don't even drink those kind of drinks. After an hour, they poked me twice. Apparently, they were also testing me for anemia.

On Friday, I called to find out the results. My sugar levels are normal. Yeay! I don't have to do the three hour test! But I have a mild case of anemia. The nurse explained that I have to take extra iron daily. She also said that it is pretty common during pregnancy, since the blood flow increases by 50% and the body doesn't have enough red blood cells. I picked up the Slow Fe (recommended by my doctor) and took the first supplement today. We'll see how I feel after it. It does say on the box that it can cause some constipation. Seriously, like I need anymore?!?!?

Appointment Update

I had my monthly appointment last Thursday. As usual they took my urine sample, blood pressure, and asked me to step on a scale. I couldn't believe how much weight I've gained. The appointment was in the second half of the day, so of course I had a pretty big lunch before and a snack. The scales showed 148lbs...blank stare....still shocked...calculating that it is 24 pounds from the pre-pregnancy weight...shocked.

The doctor came in later and found Miss A's heartbeat (that sound never gets too old) and asked me if I have any concerns. I told her that my weight was my biggest concern, especially at that moment. I forgot all of the questions that I wanted to ask her after I saw the lbs number. She reassured me that I am right on track and that the baby is gaining a lot of weight between 18-28 weeks and also my body gets a lot more blood circulation with every week, so that is where partial weight is. I felt a little better to hear that I was on track. Some days I feel like I've gained too much for being 6 months pregnant. I look at people who hardly gained any weight and feel sad. Some days I feel unattractive and fat. But everyday I feel blessed that we are on the greatest journey of a lives. Just know this Miss A, I can get sad right now at my weight gain and other random stuff, but I at the end I'll do anything for you!!!

What People Say

So, last Friday after work I stopped by at Nordstrom to get my foundation and eye liner. I've had the same sales person help me at the Laura Mercier counter that has been helping me for the last couple of years. She gives me the bag with my goodies and just stared at me and at my bump. I started smiling.
Lady: "You are pregnant?!?!?"
Mrs. V: "Yes, I am."
Lady: "No, you are so young!"
Mrs. V ...stares blankly at her...
Lady: "You look 12"

Mrs. V ...shocked face, giggling..."Well, that might be a problem if everyone thinks as you are" :)

I smiled and walked away. Seriously, I am not sure it is a compliment. She thinks this young girl (me)keeps buying a very expensive make up for herself. Where are her parents and why are they allowing her to use make up? And now she thought this teenager got herself pregnant. I can just hear her think..."of course, I was right. Poor thing, her parents don't care about her"...

Gym

No cooking, more energy = gym!!!
Yesterday, I went to the gym for the first time since I got my BFP! It's definitely been a while. But in the beginning I was too tired to even think about gym plus the m/s would make the appearance so randomly that I didn't want to get sick on the treadmill. Then I wanted to sign up for the prenatal yoga. I researched online for a good location and class but never made it there because Mr. V and I have always something planned on the weekend. So, gym it is! If only I can push myself to go at least couple of times per week, I'd feel so much better stepping on that scale at doctor's office.

Decisions...

We are still searching for our little girl's furniture and other big items.
Here is what we like so far.

The white crib set is Da Vinci, Emily Collection and the espresso set is Munire (Baby Cache) Tampa Collection.












The strollers are both by Peg Perego. One is Pliko P3 and the other one is called Switch. The Switch stroller (red) is great, since the handles are adjustable and the baby can face us.




I am almost done choosing the bedding. I will post the pic in the next post.

Compliment!

As I was getting yet another cup of water at work yesterday, the girl from a different department started talking to me:
J: I think you are one of the cutest pregnant ladies that I've ever seen.
Mrs. V: Really??? Thanks! I sure don't feel that way.
J: Seriously, I think you are. Everytime I look at you, I think you are so
cute!
Mrs.V: Thanks! I think you might be my new favorite person in the office. :)

I wish I would hear this kind of stuff more often. It definitely helps to forget about those 15-17lbs that I've gained and still picture myself as a 120lbs kind of a gal. I shouldn't be complaining though, it is all for the best!

Hello There!!!

I am back from no blogging land. I think I have a lot to catch up on.
Let's go way back and start with June. On June 18, we found out that we are having a little baby GIRL! She showed us her goods in the first few seconds of the u/s. Our little princess wasn't shy at all. I was thinking to myself that we'll have to work on some manners :) Showing all her goods to strangers and parents so fast! Or another idea that Mr. V and I had is that she was tired of hearing Mr. V call her boy names for couple of weeks before the u/s, so she decided to put a stop to it as soon as she could.

After turning from one side to another and jumping for couple of minutes, our u/s tech and doctor still couldn't get the shots of the heart. The doc wanted us to come back in couple of weeks for another follow-up. Of course, I got freaked out, especially because it was the heart pics. I kept asking what else can we do to get the shots that you need, but they told us that they spent more then enough time with us and wanted us to come back.

The next 12 days, I was nervous, anxious, and just wanted it to be June 30, our follow-up u/s. The new lady was very nice and before she went to get the doctor she asked me who was my doctor last time. After she heard the name, she told me that is exactly who she thought. Apparently, that doctor doesn't like spending time with their patients and most of the time can't take pics of the heart. Really? If only I knew that before!!!The new doc was much nicer and was able to calm me down.
As I was leaving the office, the u/s technician wispered in my ear that the shots that they took the first time were fine. Seriously people, why do you do it to your patients??? I guess the good thing was that I was able to see our little princess again. Mr. V couldn't come with me to the second u/s, so we had our little girl's moment.

Mr. V has been taking my weeekly pictures, so I'll have to post those later, since I haven't posted any of them yet.

Poll

So, I finally decided to have a poll. Please vote if you are following my blog or just dropped in. So far a lot of people at work have been saying we'll have a girl. I already had two dreams about our big u/s and in both dreams we had a baby girl. Mr.V still thinks he is still on a team blue as well as a few more people. I guess we'll see in a couple of days!

Final Results

I got a call yesterday with my final results from the NT scan. The nurse said they are pretty good and my doctor will get a copy of them. They actually turned out to be a bit higher than from the first blood test. Yeay for good results!

I am getting nervous about our big u/s next week. At this point in pregnancy, my SIL found out the not so good news. Now I am worried. I am actually not as excited as I should be about finding out the sex of our baby. I just hope and pray that he/she is healthy, that is what matters the most to us. I can't wait to hear/see you baby!

My Mom is Back

My Mom is flying back today from Israel. I haven't seen her for over 2 weeks. I know for some people that is not a lot, but I am used to seeing her almost everyday, since I drop her off at work. I missed her! I can't wait to see her today after work. It is also her birthday tomorrow. I am going to pick up her present tomorrow since I am off. She really liked the tester of anti-aging cream from Laura Mercier, so that is what she is getting, along with a cute shirt and flowers!

Ohh DH!

So, I am still gagging in the morning when I brush my teeth. My only exceptions are the weekends when I am able to sleep in till 10am. I've been telling DH that the baby probablly likes it when I am sleeping, he/she takes it from me. DH got a little defensive and started saying that he/she could take it from him as well, since he is sleeping late every morning because of his flexible work schedule (lucky!). Fine, we'll compromise for now!

Weekend Updates

Our long weekend was gone before we even knew it. I didn't get to cleaning and laundry at all. These chores will have to wait till next weekend.

DH and I went to my friend's birthday party on Sunday. My friend turned 30 years old and she decided to have a party at where else, but of course at the Russian restaurant. They had a lot of guests. Some of those people I haven't seen for almost a year. Two of my friends saw me sipping water all evening long and decided to ask. So, couple of hours into the party a few people already knew about our baby and the news started spreading around. It was weird to see some of the first reactions. I got upset at one point when one of the girls was talking to me and started telling me what happened to her during her pregnancy and how she doesn't even want kids now after spending a semester in pediatric care. DH tried to calm me down a bit after that talk saying that the girl always speaks what is on her mind without thinking/filtering what she says. He is probably right, but still.....
I danced to a few songs but mostly I spent the evening socializing with the old crew.

On Monday, we went to DH's father's bday party. Since they live about 45 minutes away, we pretty much spend the whole day at their house. That is probably the reason I didn't get anything done, since I procrastinated in the beginning of the weekend.

I think I'll have to go shopping soon. It is getting harder and harder to put on my regular clothes even with the Bella Band. Mr. V should understand, right? :)

I am back! (updated with pics)

Well, I have been back for couple of days already. Mr. V and I had a great time in Hawaii. The week went by sooooo fast and before we knew it was time to go back home. Our little one was behaving for 5 days. I didn't feel sick at all. It was such a great feeling. I was hungry all the time, but that is so much better then puking. In the last two days, my m/s returned. I think the baby doesn't like it when I get up early. Honestly, he/she takes it from me. I am not a morning person at all.

I got sick on the last day of our vacation and had to stay home on Monday. Today, I came back to work and told my boss the big news. He was very supportive and understanding. It was kind of weird to a guy, especially my boss, about it. It is funny that more and more people know about our little miracle and it still didn't sink in my head yet. My other boss came up to my cubicle at the end of the day, when everyone left and said congratulations with a big smile. WOW...our news are going to spread out so fast!

I hope and pray that you are OK there little one! I can't wait to hear/see you next time.

Vacation Time!

Well, almost. We are leaving tomorrow for Hawaii. I can't wait to do nothing on the island. Of course, we only going to do nothing for couple of days, because I already booked us two tours on the island.

I had to finish everything at work today that will have to be done next week and I feel exhausted. I am ready to be on the plain. Hopefully, I am not going to have any incidents on the plain. I am afraid I am going to feel sick and all of the restrooms will be occupied. Ok, better not think about it.

I am excited to spend some time with Mr. V and this is also baby's first trip. I hope he/she will like Hawaii and will let me enjoy the trip also. Ok, I better go home and finish packing!

Family Knows

So, we finally decided to tell our bothers and their wives about our news.
First we told Mr.V's side on Saturday. There was a pause for a few seconds after we told them and then they started asking all sort of questions. Then on Sunday, we told my brother and his wife. I actually got teary when they were congratulating us. My SIL, who is been through a lot lately, gave me a warm hug and whispered in my ear that everything will be fine. She offered to go on the walks with me and was also asking questions about everything.

To be honest, I kind of expected a different reaction from Mr. V's side. It felt like his SIL was thinking about our news over and over in her head. Their son was born in November and if our due date doesn't change then their bdays will be very close to each other. She is that kind of person who wants her family to have all of the attention. Maybe she thinks that the younger baby will still all of it? Who knows?

On a different note, I've been having some sudden pains on my lower abdomen. It is not too painful but uncomfortable. After three days I decided to call the doctor. The nurse wanted me to come in since it was the best way to check if everything is fine. I took a late lunch today and stopped by at their office. She did the pelvic exam and after a minute of found the heartbeat. I love that sound. I wish I could hear it more often, but Mr.V didn't want me to buy a doppler. Anyways, the nurse said everything was fine and it could be just the stretching pain. But just in case I had to pee in a cup to see if I don't have any bladder infections, which hopefully, I don't. After the nurse left, I decided to weight myself, since we don't have the scales at home. And I haven't gained any weight since the last appointment. Yeay!!! But it still feels like I gained a lot.

Clothes and Closet

Well, it is one wek left until our Hawaii vacation. I am really excited. It is been almost a year since our last vacation (Aruba honeymoon). Mr. V and I definitely need a vacation right about now.

My goal for this weekend is to organize/clean my closet and see what I can still fit and take with me. I don't have a lot of summer clothes since we only get couple of hot days per year. That means I get to do some shopping!!! I started yesterday by going to Nordstrom Rack. I got couple of new sleeveless blouses, a dress, one turtleneck (since it was on sale), and a little outfit for our nephew who is turning 18 months in a week. I am proud to say that I got everything on sale and only spent $70 on everything. And the best part is I can wear these clothes ever after pregnancy. I think I'll make another stop on the weekend to Old Navy and/or Target for some capris and shorts and I'll be all set for our summer vacation. I have to say Mr. V is being very supportive of my shopping. Before I would always hear that I have more clothes than my closet can fit. But now he wants to go shopping with me. Hmmm...What else can I get? :)

Finally!

So, I've been playing a waiting game for the last couple of weeks. My blood tests showed that I was a carrier of a common disease that a lot of Jewish people have. The doctor explained that if only one parent is a carrier then we have nothing to worry about. Since Mr. V also has some Jewish blood in him, he would have to do the test as well. Poor guy, he doesn't really like doing the blood tests but it was just something that had to be done either he likes it or not. I've been waiting for the results for a week and a half. I've called the doctor's office today again and later on she left me a message that Mr. V tested negative. Wooohooo!!!!! It was so good to hear those words.

We also had our NT scan yesterday. I had a blood test done in advance so that our preliminary results would be ready on the day of the NT scan. The u/s went great. It was the first time Mr. V saw our little baby. DH and I kept smiling the whole time while the u/s tech was doing the measurements. We actually had a Russian speaking lady doing the u/s and she was great at explaining what we were looking at and what her measurements were for. The baby was very cooperative. He/she was not moving much, just at certain times moving his/her arms and legs. It still feels so surreal that I have a baby inside of me. We got a CD with pics. I think the baby has more pics lately then me. But I figured that is how it will be from now on :)
We got our preliminary test results and the nurse said they were great. I just have to do another blood test in couple of weeks and then they will have our final results.

I will have to tell my boss soon, but I'll probably wait until I come back from vacation.

Remember Me?

Yes, I am back to blogging. The last couple of weeks have been crazy at work. I literally had no time to just browse the Internet, log in to GP, or blog. Well, I still have a lot to do but work will just have to wait.

I am still feeling a bit nauseous in the morning and I had couple of incidents in the evening as well. I am hoping it will go away in the next couple of weeks.

Mr. V and I decided to get away for a weekend. We booked a hotel (last suite available) in Calistoga. It was a very spontaneous trip, but that is the way I like it. We left on Saturday morning. I was OK for an hour in the car and then the nausea hit me, right before we stopped at the outlets to do some shopping. I think the shopping definitely helped (or maybe it was the fresh air). I got couple of pairs of new shoes from Nine West, a stretch band, lotions, and sour candy that help with morinng sicknessform a maternity store.

We decided not to do any spa treatments on this trip. We stayed at the pool, ate, visited one of the wineries, where DH was doing the tasting for both of us. The trip was just want we needed! We also booked our Hawaii vacation. Soooo excited!

Family Updates:
SIL is back to work today after taking couple of weeks off. I just stopped by at her work to give her flowers. She said everyone has been very supportive at work and not nosy. I just hope she'll have a fast recovery and they will be able to TTC again soon.

OK, that is it for now. Back to work!

Family

Well, my brother and SIL have been going to appointments and playing a waiting game in between them for the last couple of weeks. I can't even write the whole story since it is making me cry. The doctor found a heart problem in the baby. They don't know why or where this problem comes from but it happens in about 1/100 pregnancies. The baby would have to have 2 surgeries within the first six months and then another one and the survival rates are not high at all. They are doing abortion tomorrow. I am hoping for a fast recovery for her! And after 2-3 cycles they can start TTC again. They got KU on their first try, so hopefully it'll happen again really soon.
We went together to a synagogue on Saturday and spent a lot of time with them during the last week.

I felt horrible, sad, depressed, and low. I started thinking that I wasn't always nice towards her. It was hard for me at times to see her since we were trying for a while and it happened so fast for them. Sometimes, I didn't want to come over for diner to my parent's house, knowing that they would be there and everyone would just talk being KU and I just wanted to get as far away from those conversations as possible. But I never, ever, ever wished anything bad for her. She is family. Plus, I don't think anyone can wish for someone to go through what they are going.

I am thinking of them everyday. They know the whole family is there to support them during this time. I am wishing and hoping for their fast recovery!!!

Telling/Hearing the news

We decided to tell my parents a bit earlier then we originally planned. I know my Mom is worried since she knows that we were TTC and didn't have any luck for some time. So, to calm her down we decided to spill!
Yesterday, we went over to my parent's house. We took our first picture from the u/s with us. When we all sat down at the table, I told my parents that we got a new picture that they haven't seen yet. They started asking questions like where did you get it, who gave it to you, how come we haven't seen it before. I handed them the picture and they stared at it for a minute. My Mom asked "whose baby is that?" and she took out the picture from the photo pouch and looked at the patient's name (smart woman, I wouldn't even think of that!). They started laughing and congratulated us. Then we spent the rest of the evening talking about how my brother and I got married in the same year and now will have babies in the same year as well (positive attitude).

My brother and SIL went to find out the sex of their baby. He called me up during lunch hour and told me that I am going to have a nephew. Ohhh, a little boy for them. We already have one nephew from Mr.V's side and now my bro is having one also. He sounded very excited. He wanted a boy since the day they found out that SIL was KU.

How much can I eat?

I feel like I've been stuffing my face for the last couple of days. Today I had

Afternoon - banana, bagel, strawberries, crackers
Lunch - mashed potatoes and chicken, apple
Dinner - rice, salmon, and vegetables
Late Snack - bread and cheese at my parent's house

And I just finished eating a second banana, since I don't have any other food with me. I feel like I am starving every couple of hours and if I don't eat, I feel nauseous.

On a different note, I had m/s today again in the morning and it was again when I was brushing my teeth. I felt nauseous for couple of hours but my bagel definitely made me feel better. I realized that I need to eat bread (crackers just don't do it) in order to feel better. I should probably find another food that helps with nausea. If you have any suggestions, please let me know!

Updates

I've been pretty busy at work and too tired in the evenings to update my blog.
So, here are my updates for the last week:
I saw my new doctor last week, filled a lot of paperwork, and left with my head exploding from the amount of information. When she finished talking, I just had to ask "so what do I do first?" Here is the order: u/s to measure the baby, bloodwork, meet with the doctor again after 4-5 weeks, and I also already got an order for first trimester screening.

Today, I went to get my first u/s done. I came in early and was finishing my second bottle of water as they asked. The technician couldn't see anything at first, so I had to empty my bladder and she tried again. I could finally see a little bean on the screen but I couldn't hear the hearbeat. She told me I was measuring 5w5d. I asked couple of times if it is possible to hear for me to hear the h/b, but she already turned off the machine. She asked me if I saw the white wave line at the bottom of the machine and I said yes. But at that point I wasn't even sure what I was looking at. Apparently, that was the h/b. Thanks for letting me know!!! My doctor called me within an hour and told me that I was measuring right on track with my FF chart, which is 6w1d.

Also today, I had my first "m/s". I woke up during the night and I felt nausious, but I was able to fall asleep. In the morning though, when I was brushing my teeth I knew it was coming and ta da. I definitely felt a lot better for the next couple of hours until the next wave of nausea hit me. That is how I spent my morning and afternoon at work. Fun times! But it is all worth it at the end!

One more thing!

I was looking through the papers on my desk today and found one sesame seed from the bagel that I ate couple of days ago (gross, I know, but I thought I cleaned everything). But now I can't through it away, because 3DPregnancy said that this is what our little one looks like right now. Am I being silly? Probably not! I just hope I won't be collecting sesame seeds this week.

It has been days...

Since I last wrote in my blog. Here are all of the updates:
1. Today I got an email from 3DPregnancy.com that we are at 5 weeks. There are a lot of developments that are happening at this time. I will post all of them this week.
2. My first appointment is coming up this week. I'll probably be just filling out paperwork and going over my insurance.
3. I have been feeling more tired towards the evening. I usually feel sleepy around 9 o'clock. But this feeling only started couple of days ago.
4. I am not as hungry this week as I was last week. I mean, I had to have some food every two hours last week and now I feel like I am back to my regular eating habits.
5. I last count on how many tests I peed. It is still an addiction. I am running out of my $ tests, so hopefully I'll stop soon :)
6. I started reading "What to Expect When You Are Expecting". I only read one chapter, but it seems like a really useful book.
7. I am not as crampy as I was last week. I still get some cramps throughout the day, but nothing comparing to last week.
8. I am trying to stay positive, but sometimes those negative thoughts are crawling into my mind. I've been spending less time on GP and 1st Trimester since last week, because for some reason I only paid attention to the bad news and it stressed me out. I need to tell myself everyday that everything will be fine and that I just need to stay positive!!!

Details

As promised, I am going to write all of the juicy details. This is going to be long.
It all started on Monday morning. I decided to test at 12DPO, so I did my deed and went to take a shower, leaving the $ test on the faucet. I was praying that I would see at least a faint line on the test. I kept opening the shower door and peeking at the test and finally I saw something. That something was a very, very faint line on the test. At that point, I just wanted to finish taking a shower and to look at the test from all of the angles, just to make sure I wasn't imagining it.
I wasn't convinced by the first faint line, so at lunch time I went to Walgreens
and got two more tests. I peed on both of them (why pee on just one when I got two!). As I was walking back, I kept checking the test in my brown bag. Couple of minutes later, the word PREGNANT popped up on the screen on one of the test and a faint line showed up on another. I was over the moon. I coudln't scream or dance since I was on the street. I didn't want to tell DH over the phone, so I decided to wait till he gets home and surprise him.The rest of the workday, I was peeking at the tests in my brown bag just to see again that wonderful and beautiful word.
I never thought I am going to tell DH, but a thought popped up in my head. When DH proposed to me, he was wearing a T-shirt that said "Will you marry me?" He handed me a Sharpie to circle Yes or No. So, I thought we could keep the tradition going with our surprises. I stopped at Target after work and got a set of babysuits and in the same mall I got them personalized. The onesie said "Will you be my Daddy?".
I prepared a gift bag and left it in the living room. Here is what was inside the bag:)




I felt like those hours that I was waiting for DH were the longest hours ever. He finally got home and I said I had a little gift for him to cheer him up. He opened it and was speechless for a minute and then he looked at me and smiled. We both had tears in our eyes. It definitely didn't sink in yet. But we are cautiously excited. ~Stick baby stick~

Miracle!!!

We got our BFP on Monday! I was shocked, apparently for couple of days, since I didn't update my blog with our BIG news. It still didn't sink in yet. For now, I am hoping and praying that our little one will be a sticky baby. We are cautiously excited. I'll update my blog later today with the pics of how I told DH and his reaction :) It was priceless!!!

Update on HSG

I've been calling some hospitals and clinics to see if they do HSG and to get an idea of the average price for the test. Couple of phone calls later, I realized that all of the hospitals charge about the same price - $1,500-$3500, depending on how much of the iodine they would be using. At the end, I found one clinic 30 minutes away from my house that does the test for only $760 without insurance. I had to ask the lady couple of times if I heard the price correctly. DH and I decided that/if AF shows, then I'll do the HSG in March.
What a reality check? I have to admit I never thought of actually getting this test done. For some reason, I was soooo sure that a miracle would happen and I would get my BFP before any further testing. I am not afraid of pain. I am afraid of the unknown. I am afraid that there will be something wrong with me and I will need to do even more testing. I am trying to stay calm and not to think about it for couple of more weeks. My motto for now is "we'll cross that bridge when we come to it."

People should leave me alone!

Seriously, at least for a while. My older brother AIMed (is that even a word?) me yesterday and asked for a ride home. I hate it how he only calls or texts me when he needs something and I am getting tired of being the first to call. Anyways, so we are in the car having a conversation:
Bro: "So, when are you thinking of having a little one?"
Me: " Oh, I already have one, it is DH. I feed him, clean after him, do his laundry. He is my little kid!"
Bro: "What about another one?"
Me: "Well, I don't know. We'll see how it goes."
Bro: "Well, are you thinking within the next couple of years?"
(I am thinking more like now)
Me: "We'll see"
Bro: "Since K and I are expecting, I was thinking it would be nice to have our kids close in age."
Me: "Hmmm... do you want to decide on the gender of my baby too? Should I have a boy or a girl just to make you happy?"

What a fcuk? I am sick of people asking me about our baby plans. Am I all up in your business? Am I telling you how to live your life? No!
He doesn't know what I am going through every month and I'll keep it that way. I don't want him or anyone else feeling sorry for me. I don't want his wife to call of her friends with babies and tell them we are having problems. I don't want his wife to calculate what will be the difference in years, days, hours, and minutes between our kids. (She freaking calculates everything. Apparently, there are 84 days between our weddings based on her calculations. Get a life!)
Anyways, it was a bit annoying. Just when I am trying to forget about TTC someone always brings it up.

As for TTC world, today is 7 DPO. I am having my usually AF cramps, so probably this cycle will end with another BFN.

My Dream

After the alarm went off, it took me couple of minutes to realize that I've been dreaming. I've had a very vivid dream last night, which doesn't happen to me a lot. I remember every detail of the dream where I got my BFP. I was in my bathroon and I peed on a $tree test and saw a second line. I was shocked and in disbelief that the day finally came when I saw the second pink line on the test. I didn't tell Mr. V at that point because I was speechless and still shocked. Just to double check (so typical of me), I peed on 2 more regular test and saw the lines again. I started jumpind up and down in the bathroom and then showed the test to Mr. V. The dream was fading away at that point but I remember my last words. Mr V. and I looked at each other and I said, "so, what do we do now?"
Dream do come true, right? I mean, I haven't even Od yet, but maybe, just maybe, it'll happen soon.

My Favorite Thing

I think I found my heaven. I mean, I knew I liked chocolate but this is something I can eat everyday and not get sick of it. Ladies and gentelman, let me present you for the first time (in this blog) the Vietnamese chocolate cake!




"Heavenly chocolate cake flavored with Vietnamese coffee, topped with whipped cream and an almond shortbread cookie"
I had this out-of-this-world cake over VD diner on Saturday. We've been to this restaurant quite a few times before, but I never ordered deserts. This time, I decided to treat myself. Is it bad that I didn't want to share with Mr. V? I wanted to have it all to myself, but being a nice wifey I shared. Overall, it was a holiday. But next time, I am ordering one just one for moi and NO sharing.
Honestly, sometimes I feel like I will do anything for chocolate.

As for the TTC world, today is CD38 and I think my body is finally ready to O. I hope it is not just playing tricks with me. Let's just hope Mr.V will be in a mood for some "sexy time". I won't bore you with my chart. It really doesn't look very impressive.

Insurance Vent

So, yesterday I finally had a chance to email my insurance company and ask if they'll cover HSG procedure. After an hour of being on the phone with the hospital and getting the billing code, I get an answer from the insurance company. And guess what? With my luck, HSG is not covered. I would have to pay for it out of the pocket. Oh, and to make things even "better", HSG cost went up since January 2009. Now, instead of $2,500 it costs $3,500 just for the procedure not including the doctor's labor. I can't say that I am pissed off, I guess I am just disappointed. I mean, people pay so much money for health insurance monthly and yet it doesn't cover everything. I am not in a rush to do the test. We wanted to wait couple of more months. But now, I don't even know when/if I'll do it. Maybe, just maybe, we'll get our BFP and I won't have to do that scary test. Keeping my fingers crossed!

Come out, come out

where ever you are! Yes, ewcm I am talking about you. Where they hell are you? It is CD 25 today and I am still not getting any wcm. Usually, I get some watery cm before I O, but as of now I only put C on my FF chart. I guess O is not going to happen for another couple of days (if it'll happen at all this cycle, I am kind of loosing hope and I am giving up on this cycle). I am tired of going to the bathroom and banding down to check if I have any ewcm (sorry for TMI).


And monitor, what is up with you nowdays? How come I am getting High for almost two weeks now? Some of the GP girls said they got Highs for 10-14 days and only then it went to Peak. The first month of using CBEFM was perfect, by the book. I got 3 Highs and 2 Peak days and now it is all wrong! I can forget about testing on VD, since I am not even sure if I'll O by that time. Fun times!
So, let's make a deal. I'll continue drinking green tea everyday and all I need from you, ewcm, just to show up. Please, pretty please!

Acupuncture

Well, I had my second acupuncture appointment yesterday. I have to say I was much more relaxed this time that I fell asleep. I had more needles in me this time but none of them were painful. I am still not sure if it'll help me with TTC but I guess it is worth a try.
Lately, I just feel like I am jumping into everything that can help me to get KU. I read stuff on GP or hear at work how this and that helped people to get KU and I want to start it right away.
I've been telling myself that six months of TTC is not that bad and I shouldn't be worried, but I can't help to think that there is something wrong with me. The acupuncturist told me that in Western medicine they only start using the word infertility if the couple has been trying for over 2 years and that I am still a "young chicken" in TTC journey. But come on! It is hard to wait and get disappointed every month. I feel like my life has changed into a waiting game. I am constantly waiting for something....waiting hours between green tea and taking PV, waiting till moring to see the temp on BBT, waiting to O, waiting to see CH on the chart, waiting to test, waiting for AF to end so that we can start again. I wish TTC would be easie. I wish I would be more prepared for this long journey.

I wish I would know...

that eventually I'll get my BFP! We saw the BIL and SIL and their cutest baby yesterday. He is a little bit over a year and such a happy little boy. It is impossible not to have a smile around him. But DH looked a bit sad yesterday. I kept looking at him yesterday and I knew what he was thinking about. And here I thought I was the only one obsessing about TTC journey. Since cycle #7 started, I can't stop thinking that I am failing Mr. V and myself. I am blaming myself (even though I know it is stupid) for not being KU yet. Is there really someting wrong with me? I am trying to be optimistic, but I am only human, and of course have my down times. I wish I would know that one day, hopefully very, very soon, I'll get my very own BFP!

The Weekend!

I thought my three day weekend would never come. It is so hard to work for five days in a row after the holidays (I know I am being spoiled). But the weekend finally came and I had a blast.
Friday:
One of my close girlfriends is leaving to UK for 4 months to study abroad. So, we spent the whole day together. Our breakfast with two mimosas was followed by a frozen yogurt, some shopping, and a movie (Bride Wars), oh and frozen yogurt again for me. After the movie and some more shopping, I told her that I wanted to stop by at the restaurant where Mr. V was with his friend. Little did she know, that it was actully her going away surprise party!!! I wish I had a camera to take a picture of her face when she saw 20 familiar faces all staring at her and yelling SURPRISE!!! It was priceless. I'll miss you D very, very much!
Saturday:
Mr. V, BIL, SIL, and I went ice-skating. I forgot the last time I had to put the skates on. After a couple of minutes of my legs going different ways and one circle of not letting go of the rail, I finally felt more comfortable on ice. DH is a much better skater then I am and of course he had to show off :) We skated together but the only thing that was going through my mind was famous words from Titanic, "don't you let go, don't you ever let go". After couple of falls later, we grabbed some yummy Indian food and watched Defiance in a theater. It is definitely a hard movie to watch. It would be third on the list of difficult movies after Shiendler's List and Anne Frank's diaries.
Sunday: Mr. V and I cleaned the house. DH's friends came over for diner. Thanks, friends, for leaving so late and not letting me to get my beauty sleep.
I hope everyone had a great weekend!

Intro...

I am 26 years old. Mr. V (DH) and I recently celebrated our six year anniversary and out of those six years, we've been happily married for seven months.

We both wanted an addition to our family and started TTC a month after the wedding. Being naive and uneducated, I thought we would get our BFP within couple of months. Boy, was I wrong? AF showed her face every month and I started to wonder if getting KU was harder then I thought. I started researching online and opened up a whole new world for me when I signed up on thebump.com. I looked through all of the boards available and quickly decided that I belong to GP board. After lurking for some time, I introduced myself and began asking questions like every other newbie.

I like being part of the GP board, even though I mostly lurk. It is a place where ladies can relate and understand what you are going through. I love when regular GP girls get their BFPs. I am extremely happy for them and it also gives me hope that one day we'll get lucky and see a second line on the test.

Fast forward to January 2009...
We are on cycle #7 and so far no BFP for us. I honestly never thought we would be where we are right now. I've been charting for six cycles, using the CBEFM for one month (I always missed the window with OPKs), taking PNVs, and trying to be as healthy as I can.
I have my ups and downs every month. One day, I feel like TTC is becoming an obsession and is taking over my life. And next day (just like today) I am feeling optimistic that next cycle will be our lucky one.