I am here. I am really here. I can't even justify the non-blogging phase because I haven't been that busy, but days seem to pass me by like crazy.
I've got accepted to a university. I logged in online a few weeks ago and saw the word "Accepted" under my student file. I wasn't too excited, maybe because it is a private university and they probably accept everyone who will pay the big $. There are some positives about it though. I don't have to take GMAT and they offer all/majority classes online. Again, just drop your $ and we'll get your a diploma. They are currently evaluating my transcripts and I should know soon how many classes I will have to take to get the MBA. I think it'll be around 11-12 classes, which doesn't sound like many considering I used to take 4-5/semester for B.S. degree. But my life is so different now. I have a family and a very active toddler. I have a job and responsibilities that kick in after 5:45pm when I pick up my daughter from daycare. There is no way I can take a full load of classes. I'll just set myself for the failure. Plus, I haven't been in school in 5 years. I need to learn/remember how to be a student yet again.
I am scared.....
- scared of failing the classes
- scared of "wasting" so much money on MBA
- scared of not having enough time for family
- scared of getting the MBA and then not finding a better job
- scared of committing so much time into education again
- scared of being a wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, and now a student
But I guess I have to make a decision soon. Some of my friends finished in 2 years but they didn't have kids at that time. I guess I can start with 1 class first and then take 2 classes at a time, but even that will still be 2 years if not more.
To be completely honest with myself, I am scared because it means we would need to wait even longer now to have a second child. I think it is the biggest point I would have to come to terms with. I wonder if there are women who can do it all. I really wish I wound know the answer.
