My parents just moved a few days ago to a new condo and Mickey is now living in out house.
I know he was originally my gift 10 years ago but he's been living with my parents for all those years and now they couldn't take him with them (and they didn't want to take him).
I am sure I'll get some rolling eyes and a lot of judgement from people because we are currently looking for a new home for him. It breaks my heart to think how after all these years he'll be living with some one else but my brain understands it will be for the best. We don't have a lot of time on our hands to care for him. For the last few days I've been getting up 40 minutes earlier to drive to a little pet area to walk him, since there is no where for him to do his business. The pet playground is about 5 minutes drive but Mickey is not very impressed by it and has been waiting at the gate one minute after we get there. Ohh and yesterday...It was raining yesterday when we I walked him in the morning. I came back all wet and had to change, blow dry my hair, put new make up and leave for work.
We had to pet proof the house. Crazy, right?!?!? We never went overboard with child proofing the house since miss A was really good with not touching breakable stuff around the house. And now, we pretty much pet proofed the house.
Today he'll be home by himself until miss A and I will be back (around 6:30). I hope I won't find any accidents in the kitchen. I hope it'll be easy to load miss A and Mickey and take him for his evening walk. I hope they won't pull me in different directions. And finally, I hope it won't be too dark on the street since we don't live in the greatest neighborhood.
Lastly, I know I am being selfish here but I am not sure if I can take it all. I still want to enjoy my evening at the playground if the weather permits and not rush home to walk Mickey. Every time I look at him, I feel like he deserves more than what we can give him. I really hope we can find a good home for him and he'll get all the care and attention he deserves.
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Monday, October 15, 2012
It Is October Already
Does time fly or what? The days just pass me by, turn into weeks, and then months.
Miss A will be three next month. I can't wrap my head around this. She is such a big girl and fun to be around with. We can hold real conversation with her. She gets our jokes and comes up with her own too. She'll say "Naaahhh" when she knows I am joking with her.
Miss A was I would say about 90% potty trained as of a few days ago. A few weeks ago she refused to put on a diaper before going to sleep. The husband still wanted her to wear one but I kind of wanted her to be in control of this whole potty training thing and figure things out for herself, instead of pushing her. Well, as of a few days ago, she refused to peein the morning all day long and I had to change her underwear quite a few times. I don't get it! Honestly, it was all going fine except with #2 (she still holds it for a few days, wears a diaper to poo, and then all smiles after it) and now she is back to wearing diapers throughout the day.
Miss A still goes to bed pretty late, or maybe I just think that it is late. I mean 9:30-10pm is pretty late for a toddler, especially since mommy has to do some work around the house after she goes to bed. The night routine is still the same. I sit next to her until she falls asleep. We'll talk a little bit but then I say that we need to close our eyes and most of the times it works. There are other times where she just doesn't want to sleep. A few weeks ago, she stayed till 12:30am telling us stories and making up stuff. It is cute and stuff but what about SLEEP?!?!? The last time it happened, I just went to take a shower and then went to bed where she started asking me all kind of funny questions. How can I keep a straight face even though I was cranky? "Mommy, why do you take a shower ever day?", "Why do you get dirty so often?", "I don't get dirty and don't need a shower. Daddy doesn't need a shower"? and on and on she would go :)
We bought a Toy Story themed domino's and the kid knows how to play. It is the funniest thing to see her play and think. She'll tell us if we missed something and she'll point us in the right direction.
She'll say whose turn it is to go. She loves to win and hates to lose. She makes a happy dance and claps her hands if she wins :)
This whole life thing is just happening too fast. I keep telling myself to stop and smell the roses.
I want to enjoy my time with my little lady. There are still times I feel like I constantly struggle with finding balance with house work, work, being a mother, daughter, wife, and so on.
Miss A will be three next month. I can't wrap my head around this. She is such a big girl and fun to be around with. We can hold real conversation with her. She gets our jokes and comes up with her own too. She'll say "Naaahhh" when she knows I am joking with her.
Miss A was I would say about 90% potty trained as of a few days ago. A few weeks ago she refused to put on a diaper before going to sleep. The husband still wanted her to wear one but I kind of wanted her to be in control of this whole potty training thing and figure things out for herself, instead of pushing her. Well, as of a few days ago, she refused to pee
Miss A still goes to bed pretty late, or maybe I just think that it is late. I mean 9:30-10pm is pretty late for a toddler, especially since mommy has to do some work around the house after she goes to bed. The night routine is still the same. I sit next to her until she falls asleep. We'll talk a little bit but then I say that we need to close our eyes and most of the times it works. There are other times where she just doesn't want to sleep. A few weeks ago, she stayed till 12:30am telling us stories and making up stuff. It is cute and stuff but what about SLEEP?!?!? The last time it happened, I just went to take a shower and then went to bed where she started asking me all kind of funny questions. How can I keep a straight face even though I was cranky? "Mommy, why do you take a shower ever day?", "Why do you get dirty so often?", "I don't get dirty and don't need a shower. Daddy doesn't need a shower"? and on and on she would go :)
We bought a Toy Story themed domino's and the kid knows how to play. It is the funniest thing to see her play and think. She'll tell us if we missed something and she'll point us in the right direction.
She'll say whose turn it is to go. She loves to win and hates to lose. She makes a happy dance and claps her hands if she wins :)
This whole life thing is just happening too fast. I keep telling myself to stop and smell the roses.
I want to enjoy my time with my little lady. There are still times I feel like I constantly struggle with finding balance with house work, work, being a mother, daughter, wife, and so on.
Monday, October 1, 2012
New Job, turning 30, and Life
Am I like the world's worst blogger? I keep disappearing for months at a time and then kick myself in the butt for not documenting our life.
I've been at the new job for a month and a half now. I accepted an offer and said no to MBA for now. The whole interviewing for this job was a very long and tedious process. At one point I was pissed that they took so much of my time and kept calling/scheduling for more one on one and group talks.
4 interviews, 1 phone interview, 1 test, and background check later I was offered a position. I felt like I was getting a position at the CIA office. Anyways, I thought long and hard and at the end accepted the offer. It is been interesting and at times awkward. I am not a very social person and don't really like to meet/chat around the office and to make small talk. But with the new job you can't really escape out of it. I've felt out of place many times already since a lot of employees have known each other for years already and I am the new girl. Just like high school all over again :)
I've turned 30 last week. 30 years old. Man, it sounds old. When I was in my twenties 30 seemed like so far away. People in their thirties looked so mature and seemed like most of them got their shit together. I've heard a lot of people say how they loved turning 30 and experience their best years (apparently the best years are the 30s now). But I honestly think they are lying. I was a bumped the night before my bday. Thirty means I am getting older. I've entered the 4th decade of my life. My baby girl is growing up. My husband who is 7 years older then me is nearing his 40s. My parents are getting older too. See, all those things make me sad. But this is life, right?
Anyways, I've decided just to host a dinner at the nice restaurant with all of my close friends. And that is exactly what we did. It was awesome. The food and ambiance were great. I've enjoyed talking to each and every one of my guest. I've known most of the people for over 10 years. We've made some great memories together. I loved how random old stories popped up into the conversation.
The husband is again heading downhills right now. He had his good moments a few months back where he felt almost like himself. But now, his hands are hurting again and we are starting the accupuncture all over again. I hope his bad days will be over soon and he'll be feeling better.
Our baby girl is still in daycare. We enrolled her in a new gymnastics class. She needs to get used to it but she tells us she only wants to go there now. We also enrolled her in a Russian school a few weeks ago. She'll be attending a 45 minute class on Sunday morning where she'll learn rhymes, alphabet, logic, and other great things.
This is what life is all about lately. As I always say, I'll try to update my blog more frequently.
I've been at the new job for a month and a half now. I accepted an offer and said no to MBA for now. The whole interviewing for this job was a very long and tedious process. At one point I was pissed that they took so much of my time and kept calling/scheduling for more one on one and group talks.
4 interviews, 1 phone interview, 1 test, and background check later I was offered a position. I felt like I was getting a position at the CIA office. Anyways, I thought long and hard and at the end accepted the offer. It is been interesting and at times awkward. I am not a very social person and don't really like to meet/chat around the office and to make small talk. But with the new job you can't really escape out of it. I've felt out of place many times already since a lot of employees have known each other for years already and I am the new girl. Just like high school all over again :)
I've turned 30 last week. 30 years old. Man, it sounds old. When I was in my twenties 30 seemed like so far away. People in their thirties looked so mature and seemed like most of them got their shit together. I've heard a lot of people say how they loved turning 30 and experience their best years (apparently the best years are the 30s now). But I honestly think they are lying. I was a bumped the night before my bday. Thirty means I am getting older. I've entered the 4th decade of my life. My baby girl is growing up. My husband who is 7 years older then me is nearing his 40s. My parents are getting older too. See, all those things make me sad. But this is life, right?
Anyways, I've decided just to host a dinner at the nice restaurant with all of my close friends. And that is exactly what we did. It was awesome. The food and ambiance were great. I've enjoyed talking to each and every one of my guest. I've known most of the people for over 10 years. We've made some great memories together. I loved how random old stories popped up into the conversation.
The husband is again heading downhills right now. He had his good moments a few months back where he felt almost like himself. But now, his hands are hurting again and we are starting the accupuncture all over again. I hope his bad days will be over soon and he'll be feeling better.
Our baby girl is still in daycare. We enrolled her in a new gymnastics class. She needs to get used to it but she tells us she only wants to go there now. We also enrolled her in a Russian school a few weeks ago. She'll be attending a 45 minute class on Sunday morning where she'll learn rhymes, alphabet, logic, and other great things.
This is what life is all about lately. As I always say, I'll try to update my blog more frequently.
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
Student For Ever
I am here. I am really here. I can't even justify the non-blogging phase because I haven't been that busy, but days seem to pass me by like crazy.
I've got accepted to a university. I logged in online a few weeks ago and saw the word "Accepted" under my student file. I wasn't too excited, maybe because it is a private university and they probably accept everyone who will pay the big $. There are some positives about it though. I don't have to take GMAT and they offer all/majority classes online. Again, just drop your $ and we'll get your a diploma. They are currently evaluating my transcripts and I should know soon how many classes I will have to take to get the MBA. I think it'll be around 11-12 classes, which doesn't sound like many considering I used to take 4-5/semester for B.S. degree. But my life is so different now. I have a family and a very active toddler. I have a job and responsibilities that kick in after 5:45pm when I pick up my daughter from daycare. There is no way I can take a full load of classes. I'll just set myself for the failure. Plus, I haven't been in school in 5 years. I need to learn/remember how to be a student yet again.
I am scared.....
- scared of failing the classes
- scared of "wasting" so much money on MBA
- scared of not having enough time for family
- scared of getting the MBA and then not finding a better job
- scared of committing so much time into education again
- scared of being a wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, and now a student
But I guess I have to make a decision soon. Some of my friends finished in 2 years but they didn't have kids at that time. I guess I can start with 1 class first and then take 2 classes at a time, but even that will still be 2 years if not more.
To be completely honest with myself, I am scared because it means we would need to wait even longer now to have a second child. I think it is the biggest point I would have to come to terms with. I wonder if there are women who can do it all. I really wish I wound know the answer.
I've got accepted to a university. I logged in online a few weeks ago and saw the word "Accepted" under my student file. I wasn't too excited, maybe because it is a private university and they probably accept everyone who will pay the big $. There are some positives about it though. I don't have to take GMAT and they offer all/majority classes online. Again, just drop your $ and we'll get your a diploma. They are currently evaluating my transcripts and I should know soon how many classes I will have to take to get the MBA. I think it'll be around 11-12 classes, which doesn't sound like many considering I used to take 4-5/semester for B.S. degree. But my life is so different now. I have a family and a very active toddler. I have a job and responsibilities that kick in after 5:45pm when I pick up my daughter from daycare. There is no way I can take a full load of classes. I'll just set myself for the failure. Plus, I haven't been in school in 5 years. I need to learn/remember how to be a student yet again.
I am scared.....
- scared of failing the classes
- scared of "wasting" so much money on MBA
- scared of not having enough time for family
- scared of getting the MBA and then not finding a better job
- scared of committing so much time into education again
- scared of being a wife, mother, daughter, sister, aunt, and now a student
But I guess I have to make a decision soon. Some of my friends finished in 2 years but they didn't have kids at that time. I guess I can start with 1 class first and then take 2 classes at a time, but even that will still be 2 years if not more.
To be completely honest with myself, I am scared because it means we would need to wait even longer now to have a second child. I think it is the biggest point I would have to come to terms with. I wonder if there are women who can do it all. I really wish I wound know the answer.
Friday, June 22, 2012
Miss A's Updates - 31 Months
Today I am in a better mood. The sun finally showed up after a few days of a very depressing weather. I mean, hello, we are in June. My spirits are up because it is Friday and I get to spend a few days with my family.
Any who...Miss A had a 2.5 years (crazy, huh?) appointment a month late and here are her stats:
Weight - 30lbs (my 30 lbs of happiness :)) 50%
Height - 3 feet tall exacly 60% I think
It gets a little bit tricky not that she knows she is at the doctor's office. She really dislikes all of the nurses but she can handle the doc OK. She let the doc check her but only after following mommy's example. The doc checked my ears and only then she was OK with turning her head. She didn't get any shots and boy am I thankful because when miss A gets mad and upset now days, it lasts a while.
She is still talking a lot and her vocabulary constantly increases. She talks in sentences now and can carry real conversations. She lets me know about her day in daycare, what she ate, who was there, who dropped her off and so on.
I am not sure if it is only my child that does it but it is seriously crazy.... Whenever she says something she wants me to repeat what she said. I think it is her way of making sure I understood her. So, I've read articles where they say that women talk about 20,000 words a day. Well, I can honestly say that I probably speak about 2,000 words before 6pm and then rest after I pick her up from daycare. :)
She sort of understand jokes now. It is pretty cool to see her brain work. I'll (daddy) make a joke, she'll process it for a few seconds, then have the biggest grin on her face and says "neeeett (no). A few days ago, she didn't get a joke though. When miss A asked her daddy where mommy was, he said she went on vacation. She started crying and saying that we were supposed to go together. Yesterday, she asked the same question and got the same reply but this time she smiled and said "neet, she is at work".
We are still having poop problem. She'll only go twice per week. I can see she is being uncomfortable at times but she'll still hold it in. The doc suggested Myralax and we'll probably try it.
She loves to cuddle up with daddy before bedtime (and I am assuming in the morning when I am at work). She is so gentle with him, so carrying, and so lady like. She'll say "idi suda" (come here), hugs him, and they just lay there until I ruin it all and ask the husband to leave because she wouldn't get dressed otherwise.
She has learned new songs at daycare:
Twinkle, twinkle,
Mama, pervoe slovo
Krilatie kacheli - bits of it only
We listen to a lot of kid's songs in the car and she tries to sing along. Love it!
She is growing out of her 2T clothes. Some of her tops are still 2T but the pants are now all too short. Thankfully, this mama has a whole new wardrobe for her next size :)
Your favorite phrase now days is "ya tebya lublu" (i love you). You can say it randomly throughout the day and/or right aftera huge tantrum including crocodile tears you misbehaved. I am not really sure you know what they mean but I pretend that you do.
Ariela is still enjoying gymnastics class. She is doing all of the tricks mostly by herself. I call her a princess of the trampoline. Seriously, this kid can jump and can jump very, very high bringing her knees up, doing open/close, and sit drops. I believe jumping on mama's bed everyday has been a good practice.
She has a few girlfriends from daycare and one from playground that she loves (sometimes there is a small step from love to hate, but it happens to the best of us). She is not really friendly with other kids and thinks the whole playground, gym, zoo, library, world belongs to her and her friends only.
She is still a charming, carrying, sympatheric lady but this time just throw amany few toddler tantrums in there. She loves to play together, color, sing, dance, and jump. She loves puzzles, letters, flash cards, balls, and playing with water.
Mommy and daddy are pretty fond of you. You make us laugh and giggle like little kids. You let us see the world from your pespective leaving all the problems and worrying behind. You taught us how to put someone else first. You taught us a whole new way of loving someone. Baby girl, we love you and don't you ever, ever forget it!
Love,
Mom
Any who...Miss A had a 2.5 years (crazy, huh?) appointment a month late and here are her stats:
Weight - 30lbs (my 30 lbs of happiness :)) 50%
Height - 3 feet tall exacly 60% I think
It gets a little bit tricky not that she knows she is at the doctor's office. She really dislikes all of the nurses but she can handle the doc OK. She let the doc check her but only after following mommy's example. The doc checked my ears and only then she was OK with turning her head. She didn't get any shots and boy am I thankful because when miss A gets mad and upset now days, it lasts a while.
She is still talking a lot and her vocabulary constantly increases. She talks in sentences now and can carry real conversations. She lets me know about her day in daycare, what she ate, who was there, who dropped her off and so on.
I am not sure if it is only my child that does it but it is seriously crazy.... Whenever she says something she wants me to repeat what she said. I think it is her way of making sure I understood her. So, I've read articles where they say that women talk about 20,000 words a day. Well, I can honestly say that I probably speak about 2,000 words before 6pm and then rest after I pick her up from daycare. :)
She sort of understand jokes now. It is pretty cool to see her brain work. I'll (daddy) make a joke, she'll process it for a few seconds, then have the biggest grin on her face and says "neeeett (no). A few days ago, she didn't get a joke though. When miss A asked her daddy where mommy was, he said she went on vacation. She started crying and saying that we were supposed to go together. Yesterday, she asked the same question and got the same reply but this time she smiled and said "neet, she is at work".
We are still having poop problem. She'll only go twice per week. I can see she is being uncomfortable at times but she'll still hold it in. The doc suggested Myralax and we'll probably try it.
She loves to cuddle up with daddy before bedtime (and I am assuming in the morning when I am at work). She is so gentle with him, so carrying, and so lady like. She'll say "idi suda" (come here), hugs him, and they just lay there until I ruin it all and ask the husband to leave because she wouldn't get dressed otherwise.
She has learned new songs at daycare:
Twinkle, twinkle,
Mama, pervoe slovo
Krilatie kacheli - bits of it only
We listen to a lot of kid's songs in the car and she tries to sing along. Love it!
She is growing out of her 2T clothes. Some of her tops are still 2T but the pants are now all too short. Thankfully, this mama has a whole new wardrobe for her next size :)
Your favorite phrase now days is "ya tebya lublu" (i love you). You can say it randomly throughout the day and/or right after
Ariela is still enjoying gymnastics class. She is doing all of the tricks mostly by herself. I call her a princess of the trampoline. Seriously, this kid can jump and can jump very, very high bringing her knees up, doing open/close, and sit drops. I believe jumping on mama's bed everyday has been a good practice.
She has a few girlfriends from daycare and one from playground that she loves (sometimes there is a small step from love to hate, but it happens to the best of us). She is not really friendly with other kids and thinks the whole playground, gym, zoo, library, world belongs to her and her friends only.
She is still a charming, carrying, sympatheric lady but this time just throw a
Mommy and daddy are pretty fond of you. You make us laugh and giggle like little kids. You let us see the world from your pespective leaving all the problems and worrying behind. You taught us how to put someone else first. You taught us a whole new way of loving someone. Baby girl, we love you and don't you ever, ever forget it!
Love,
Mom
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Blah Post
I was going to write about miss A and what she has been up to lately but I am just not in that mood.
I've been looking for a new job. I am grateful that I have a job right now but I feel like I am stuck in this position with no career and intellectual growth opportunity. Anyways, I've been to a few interviews in the last month. Both companies invited me for a second interview and it all sounded promising. I don't usually keep my hopes up but there is always a tiny, teeny feeling inside of me hoping to hear the good news. I liked the second company, the people, office, environment but not the location. After two weeks of waiting I just got a rejection email. Even if it wasn't the perfect job, I still feel bumped. I feel like my education and experience is not enough for a senior position and my salary requirements are too high for a mid-level position. Why hire me when the company can hire a person with Master's and/or CPA.
On this note, I've called one of the universities today. I want to see how many classes I'll need to take in order to get a Master's degree and how much it'll cost. I am pretty sure the cost will be huge and it'll need to be a commitment on my side. But it doesn't hurt to ask and think about it.
Lately, a lot of questions have been up in the air. I hate being in this unknown stage.
Refinance or not, stay in the city or move to the suburbs, where to look for a job (if we decide to move eventually), public or private school for miss A, and lastly, the big one mr. V has asked one child or two.... Really?!?! It was never a question for me. I always wanted two kids. I want miss A to have a brother or a sister. I want to see her be an older sister, to see them grow up, play, fight, hug, and kiss each other. That question totally blew me off and I almost started crying yesterday. I am sure we'll figure out the answers and solutions to all of those questions but sometimes, in the moments like this, I wish mr. V wouldn't be such a planner in everything he does.
I've been looking for a new job. I am grateful that I have a job right now but I feel like I am stuck in this position with no career and intellectual growth opportunity. Anyways, I've been to a few interviews in the last month. Both companies invited me for a second interview and it all sounded promising. I don't usually keep my hopes up but there is always a tiny, teeny feeling inside of me hoping to hear the good news. I liked the second company, the people, office, environment but not the location. After two weeks of waiting I just got a rejection email. Even if it wasn't the perfect job, I still feel bumped. I feel like my education and experience is not enough for a senior position and my salary requirements are too high for a mid-level position. Why hire me when the company can hire a person with Master's and/or CPA.
On this note, I've called one of the universities today. I want to see how many classes I'll need to take in order to get a Master's degree and how much it'll cost. I am pretty sure the cost will be huge and it'll need to be a commitment on my side. But it doesn't hurt to ask and think about it.
Lately, a lot of questions have been up in the air. I hate being in this unknown stage.
Refinance or not, stay in the city or move to the suburbs, where to look for a job (if we decide to move eventually), public or private school for miss A, and lastly, the big one mr. V has asked one child or two.... Really?!?! It was never a question for me. I always wanted two kids. I want miss A to have a brother or a sister. I want to see her be an older sister, to see them grow up, play, fight, hug, and kiss each other. That question totally blew me off and I almost started crying yesterday. I am sure we'll figure out the answers and solutions to all of those questions but sometimes, in the moments like this, I wish mr. V wouldn't be such a planner in everything he does.
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Family Vacation
We came back a few weeks ago from our third vacation to Mexico. 5 hours on the plane and about 30 minutes shuttle ride and we reached our destination in Riviera Maya.
This was the longest plane ride for miss A. We woke her up bright and early. For the first few hours she seemed a bit lost and sleepy, but as soon as we got on the plane, she was back to being adorable, smiling, can't sit-in-one-place-for-two-minutes toddler. I was hoping she would at least nap for anhour two hours on the plane but universe was against it. The girl didn't nap at all. I was sort of prepared to entertain her for 2-3 hours on the plane but not for the whole flight. Come on, enormous amount of stickers, drawings, and books can only last maximum two hours. The rest of the time she was entertained by coming up with the ways of drinking milk/water - from a cup (like a normal person), straw (also normal), spoon (semi-normal), dipping her fingers (so not normal), and of course that whole fun ended with milk being on her outfit.
When we finally got to the hotel, I was able to relax a little bit. We checked in, went straight to our room, changed into swimming gear and off we went to the pool. We traveled with two more families this time and their kids, but miss A was the oldest one. The whole week was just relaxing. We woke up, had breakfast, swam in the pool, played in the kid's area and water slides, ate lunch, napped, swam in the pool, had dinner, watched a show, and put baby down to bed. We kept pretty much the same routine for a week. We also spent a day on the beach, where we jumped on waves, watched enormous amount of fish passing us by, and miss A and her daddy attempted to make a castle. Let's just say attempt is a good word for it and they both need more experience in that area.
We traveled with two more families and their kids and this was out first trip with the crowd. Miss A was the oldest one and I think she was a bit bored with the younger kids. But, nonetheless, she had so much fun! I think her mission this trip was to see how deep into the water she can go all by herself. She wasn't into swimming. She got in the water, went until the water was at her shoulders, yelled to get our attention "ya bol'shaya devochka" (I am a big girl), then got out of the water and that followed by about 125421 more times of doing the exact-same-thing. Honestly, I thought she would get bored after 10 minutes but no, the girl kept on going. She would take breaks for a smoothie, ice cream, and photos with a monkey and birds. Even though she was mastering her skills of getting into the water, someone (aka moi) had to be right there next to her. I was pretty much her shadow in the pool. Three steps into the water, three steps back, step up, step down, three steps into the water, and so on. You get the point. This whole shadow thing got much better once I was supplied with a drink. Dirty Monkey and Sangria were my two beverages of choice.
A little more on traveling with other families. We've known these people for a long time, even before marriages and kids. One couple was very laid back and just went with the flow. We are sort of like that too. The other couple, however, was constantly complaining. They are doing pretty well financially right now and think they can buy the wholeworld, resort.The room wasn't cleaned on time. The server didn't come to the pool area (we told to try next time get spot 0.25 miles closer to the pool, just a thought). The food selection at breakfast was horrible (mind you, the girl said it and she doesn't even eat breakfast). Blah.... I got sick of hearing all this after a few days and just ignored.
Apart from this, we all had a great time and I can't wait until our next vacation. The best part is I got to spend time with my family. A week with my little girl without every day stress, cell phones, computers, TV, and other things that distract me from being there just for her. A week of seeing how happy, silly, grateful, she is for us taking her there. A week of seeing her eyes light up and shine. A week of watching her play and playing right there with her. To me, this was a week of paradise and I couldn't have asked for more.
This was the longest plane ride for miss A. We woke her up bright and early. For the first few hours she seemed a bit lost and sleepy, but as soon as we got on the plane, she was back to being adorable, smiling, can't sit-in-one-place-for-two-minutes toddler. I was hoping she would at least nap for an
When we finally got to the hotel, I was able to relax a little bit. We checked in, went straight to our room, changed into swimming gear and off we went to the pool. We traveled with two more families this time and their kids, but miss A was the oldest one. The whole week was just relaxing. We woke up, had breakfast, swam in the pool, played in the kid's area and water slides, ate lunch, napped, swam in the pool, had dinner, watched a show, and put baby down to bed. We kept pretty much the same routine for a week. We also spent a day on the beach, where we jumped on waves, watched enormous amount of fish passing us by, and miss A and her daddy attempted to make a castle. Let's just say attempt is a good word for it and they both need more experience in that area.
We traveled with two more families and their kids and this was out first trip with the crowd. Miss A was the oldest one and I think she was a bit bored with the younger kids. But, nonetheless, she had so much fun! I think her mission this trip was to see how deep into the water she can go all by herself. She wasn't into swimming. She got in the water, went until the water was at her shoulders, yelled to get our attention "ya bol'shaya devochka" (I am a big girl), then got out of the water and that followed by about 125421 more times of doing the exact-same-thing. Honestly, I thought she would get bored after 10 minutes but no, the girl kept on going. She would take breaks for a smoothie, ice cream, and photos with a monkey and birds. Even though she was mastering her skills of getting into the water, someone (aka moi) had to be right there next to her. I was pretty much her shadow in the pool. Three steps into the water, three steps back, step up, step down, three steps into the water, and so on. You get the point. This whole shadow thing got much better once I was supplied with a drink. Dirty Monkey and Sangria were my two beverages of choice.
A little more on traveling with other families. We've known these people for a long time, even before marriages and kids. One couple was very laid back and just went with the flow. We are sort of like that too. The other couple, however, was constantly complaining. They are doing pretty well financially right now and think they can buy the whole
Apart from this, we all had a great time and I can't wait until our next vacation. The best part is I got to spend time with my family. A week with my little girl without every day stress, cell phones, computers, TV, and other things that distract me from being there just for her. A week of seeing how happy, silly, grateful, she is for us taking her there. A week of seeing her eyes light up and shine. A week of watching her play and playing right there with her. To me, this was a week of paradise and I couldn't have asked for more.
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Two and a Half
The title says it all. Baby girl, today you turned two and a half years old. It is just unreal and unexplainable. It seems like you've been part of our lives for the whole two and a half years but at the same time we've only been blessed with your presence for a short two and a half years. I recently asked you dad what was our life, evening, and weekends before you were born because I simply don't remember. You basically took over my life and there is nothing wrong with that.
Let's see what you are up to now:
Let's see what you are up to now:
1. We came back from our family vacation a few weeks ago. It was your third time vacationing with us in Mexico and forth time flying with us.
The flight was about 5 hours and it was the longest one for you. You didn't sleep on the plain at all, even though I was hoping you would give you mama a break. We woke you up early too (around 6am) but that still didn't do the trick. I think you were just excited about the adventure ahead of you. Let me just say, girl, you had a blast! I'll do a separate post on the vacation later.
2. You are becoming way too independent. I kind of like it and kind of don't. I love to see how you are being all grown up. You can easily dress yourself, put on shoes, zip up the jacket, eat/drink without help, sit on a big chair, get into car seat, and other things you can already do by yourself. But I really dislike that you don't need my help as much as you used to. Now I notice that I try to help you and you put on your big girl panties and tell me you can do it by yourself.
3. Now that is finally starting to get warmer outside, you and I can finally head to a playground after I pick you up from daycare. You go crazy and wild there especially if you see Sophia (playground/gymnastics buddy) and/or girls from daycare. You run around after each other, jump, slide side by side, play with sand and ball. I love watching you interact with other kids. But please just stay away from mean, older kids. Last week, you tried to pick up some sand next to a girl who was also playing with sand and she just pushed you away, blocked the sand, and tried to yell something. It melts my heart to see you so helpless and clueless. And quite honestly I wanted to smack that girl. So, for every one's benefit, let's just play with nice kids.
4. I call you our little monkey nowadays because that is exactly what you are. You repeat everything we say.
5.You've become quite talkative and can have a real conversation. Whenever you don't understand a word, you put a hand to your ear and ask "chto?" (what?). Whenever you hear a sound outside or inside the house that is not familiar to you you always ask "mama, chto eto bilo?" (mom, what was that?). Whenever it works to your advantage you always say "ya bol'shaya" ( I am big) and whenever it doesn't you go "no ya malen'kaya" (but I am little). You are one smart cookie.
6. You are a big fan of candy and ice cream. You had quite a lot of ice cream on vacation and now we are slowly cutting back :)
7. You still like Luntik and he is been your favorite cartoon character for quite some time now. I wonder when you'll want to switch. Anytime, baby girl, anytime. That music and voices are getting old and are pretty annoying. I've tried introducing new cartoons but you watch one episode and then request Luntik.
8. You love to color and enjoy when someone is drawing with you. For example, you dad will draw you a letter or a shape and you'll color the it inside. Then you'll ask for a new shape and that will go on for about 15 minutes.
9. You play with your older cousin and your baby cousin. You look up to the older one and try to take care of the younger. You'll kiss Alyssa especially if other people watch you do it and go "ahhh" and "oohh, how cute". I've noticed that you'll stop with the kisses if no one is watching you or you'll get their attention and will kiss her again. You just love attention.
10. Speaking of attention, I feel like you constantly need it. You still don't like to play by yourself. You always want other people to watch you do gymnastic tricks or just to see how cute and silly you are. You crave it and you know how to get it.
11. I also call you a drama queen occasionally. I am quite sure we'll sign you up for a theater program and you'll be good at it. I think it is in your genes. No, no, you definitely didn't get it from me or your father. Most likely from older generations. Who knows, maybe you'll grow up to be famous and all :)
12. You are really affectionate, especially with your daddy. You'll hug and kiss him. You'll lay on his chest whenever he is not feeling good. You'll stroke his hair and tell him it'll be OK (skoro proidet). Your daddy is quite fond of you too. I've known him for many years and only you, baby girl, can make him smile so often.
What more can I say that I haven't said before. My love for you grows everyday. I don't think there are words to explain what you mean to me, to us. Just now that we love you to infinity and beyond.
With all my love,
Mama
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Miss A's updates
My baby girl,
I apologize in advance for not writing as much as I should be about your accomplishments, new skills, new words, and your life. It just so happened that I was cleaning my work email and stumbled on the email I’ve sent to your dad where I copied him on your 2 year blog post. I’ve read it again for 89th time probably. It made me cry. It made remember what you did and said almost six months ago (does time fly or what?). It sent me back in time and let me re-live those moments. And here I am again, sitting at my desk and thinking why I don’t do this more often.
Your vocabulary is constantly increasing. You talk in sentences now. You are a little copy cat and repeat everything we say. My favorite is when you wake up on the weekend and start telling me stories from previous week, day, or just some random things from a while back. Seriously, it is the cutest thing when you open your eyes, make sure your mama is home, and then off you go with your stories. The latest ones have been about Mickey and his paw hurting him and about your baby cousin Alyssa who didn’t feel good in a car.
You love cartoons. Miss A is totally over the Toys Story cartoon and her favorite character, Buzz. Now, all you want to watch is Luntik, the Russian cartoon. At least it is a bit educational and has a moral at the end of each short episode.
You are mastering your puppy eyes skills, especially when you are asking for one more cartoon and/or candy. You’ll make a sweet face and ask for one more cartoon in the evening and I’ll say it is the last one and ask you what will happen after and you reply “the last one and then sleep”. You don’t always follow what you say though. We are working on it though.
You finally started to notice your baby cousin Alyssa. She is 14 months younger then you are. You’ve paid absolutely no attention to her in the past, except when she touched your toys and you didn’t want to share. Now you are giving her toys, watching over her, trying to play together, help her get up when she falls, share candy and other yummy food with her. It makes me think that you are almost ready for a baby brother or sister. Although when I ask you if you want to be a big sister you reply without even thinking “NO”.
You also want to play with your older cousin but that little scorpio has a mind of its own.
You like going to daycare, which makes me sooo happy. I love to know that you are taken care of and have friends to play with. It does make me sad at times that I am stuck at work and can’t spend more time with you.
I’ve purchased an I Like You book in pink and I think it is time to take it out and start using it. I want to record the funny phrases and episodes of your everyday life. I am sure I’ll always come up with stuff to write in your book.
You still enjoy your gymnastics class. Your favorite is the trampoline jumping and sit drops.
You love going to a Japanese restaurant. Your favorite dish is the teriyaki salmon with rice and avocado. You also steal some “susi” (aka sushi) from us but first you take out the seaweed since it is “kaka” to you.
You sing the ABS song and Clean Up song when you help to clean the toys. Your teachers at daycare always mention that you are the best helper. You are learning to count. It is quite funny because you skip some number and also mix Russian and English numbers. It goes like this “odin, dva, three, four, five, vosem’, devyat, dvenadjat’”. I also started to teach you letters at home.
The first thing you say when you enter daycare is “ya v trusikax” (I am wearing panties). You want everyone around you to know that you are a big girl in your big girl underwear.
We are going on a family vacation in a few weeks. I’ve been telling you about the pool, waterslides, playground, and choo choo train. You’ve requested a pink swimsuit, white sunglasses, white hat, and red nail polish. Seriously, how did you come up with such a glamorous outfit all by yourself?
You like when we have guests over. You want to show off your toys, gymnastics skills, and how you can put your princess puzzle together all by yourself.
Lately, after we come home from daycare, you want to change your clothes and pick out a skirt, tights, and pretty black shoes. Again, seriously, how do you come up with those outfits? Your Mama hardly ever wears skirts, but you seem to love them!
Every month with you is joy. Every day with you is full smiles, laughter, tears, snuggles, and hugs. I am not a big fan of you becoming more and more independent though. I want you to be your mama’s girl forever!
With all my love,
Mom
I apologize in advance for not writing as much as I should be about your accomplishments, new skills, new words, and your life. It just so happened that I was cleaning my work email and stumbled on the email I’ve sent to your dad where I copied him on your 2 year blog post. I’ve read it again for 89th time probably. It made me cry. It made remember what you did and said almost six months ago (does time fly or what?). It sent me back in time and let me re-live those moments. And here I am again, sitting at my desk and thinking why I don’t do this more often.
Your vocabulary is constantly increasing. You talk in sentences now. You are a little copy cat and repeat everything we say. My favorite is when you wake up on the weekend and start telling me stories from previous week, day, or just some random things from a while back. Seriously, it is the cutest thing when you open your eyes, make sure your mama is home, and then off you go with your stories. The latest ones have been about Mickey and his paw hurting him and about your baby cousin Alyssa who didn’t feel good in a car.
You love cartoons. Miss A is totally over the Toys Story cartoon and her favorite character, Buzz. Now, all you want to watch is Luntik, the Russian cartoon. At least it is a bit educational and has a moral at the end of each short episode.
You are mastering your puppy eyes skills, especially when you are asking for one more cartoon and/or candy. You’ll make a sweet face and ask for one more cartoon in the evening and I’ll say it is the last one and ask you what will happen after and you reply “the last one and then sleep”. You don’t always follow what you say though. We are working on it though.
You finally started to notice your baby cousin Alyssa. She is 14 months younger then you are. You’ve paid absolutely no attention to her in the past, except when she touched your toys and you didn’t want to share. Now you are giving her toys, watching over her, trying to play together, help her get up when she falls, share candy and other yummy food with her. It makes me think that you are almost ready for a baby brother or sister. Although when I ask you if you want to be a big sister you reply without even thinking “NO”.
You also want to play with your older cousin but that little scorpio has a mind of its own.
You like going to daycare, which makes me sooo happy. I love to know that you are taken care of and have friends to play with. It does make me sad at times that I am stuck at work and can’t spend more time with you.
I’ve purchased an I Like You book in pink and I think it is time to take it out and start using it. I want to record the funny phrases and episodes of your everyday life. I am sure I’ll always come up with stuff to write in your book.
You still enjoy your gymnastics class. Your favorite is the trampoline jumping and sit drops.
You love going to a Japanese restaurant. Your favorite dish is the teriyaki salmon with rice and avocado. You also steal some “susi” (aka sushi) from us but first you take out the seaweed since it is “kaka” to you.
You sing the ABS song and Clean Up song when you help to clean the toys. Your teachers at daycare always mention that you are the best helper. You are learning to count. It is quite funny because you skip some number and also mix Russian and English numbers. It goes like this “odin, dva, three, four, five, vosem’, devyat, dvenadjat’”. I also started to teach you letters at home.
The first thing you say when you enter daycare is “ya v trusikax” (I am wearing panties). You want everyone around you to know that you are a big girl in your big girl underwear.
We are going on a family vacation in a few weeks. I’ve been telling you about the pool, waterslides, playground, and choo choo train. You’ve requested a pink swimsuit, white sunglasses, white hat, and red nail polish. Seriously, how did you come up with such a glamorous outfit all by yourself?
You like when we have guests over. You want to show off your toys, gymnastics skills, and how you can put your princess puzzle together all by yourself.
Lately, after we come home from daycare, you want to change your clothes and pick out a skirt, tights, and pretty black shoes. Again, seriously, how do you come up with those outfits? Your Mama hardly ever wears skirts, but you seem to love them!
Every month with you is joy. Every day with you is full smiles, laughter, tears, snuggles, and hugs. I am not a big fan of you becoming more and more independent though. I want you to be your mama’s girl forever!
With all my love,
Mom
Monday, March 26, 2012
It is about time
For a new post. I usually have some ideas randomly hit me and by the time I get to my computer I totally forget what they are. So, I'll just spill what is going on in my head.
1. (Bare with me...I am a little emotional... it is that time of the month). Mr. V is getting better. Slowly but surely. I don't get to hear a lot of complaining anymore from him. At this point, we can go a day at a time without talking about his hands, ears, back, teeth, etc. But there isn't a day where I want to ask for his help and then stop myself because I know if he'll help then it'll set him back again. It is little things like taking out a garbage, bringing extra chairs for guests, bringing laundry, and so on. Being the only man in the house, I am pretty sure he feels sucky that he can't/shouldn't do any of those stuff. I go on for days thinking I am a super human being and that I can do it all by myself. And then I collapse. I get emotional and stressed out. I understand that in reality I can't do it all and I need help. Believe me, it takes a lot to come to terms with that.
2. I've read quite a few posts on husbands, significant others, and potential husband materials and all of the bloggers mentioned how lucky they are to have husbands, their soul mates, their partners in life and they can't imagine their lives without them. Well, of course I start to question my relationship and no good can come from that, just trust me on that one. Mr. V is a very nice guy. He is smart, handsome (at least I think so), honest, could do all the manual work around the house. BUT...he is not 100% perfect and neither am I. We fight, we quarrel, we get angry with each other and don't let go and forget easily. He likes to tell people how to live their lives and I hate it. He likes to comment on my lack of knowledge on a particular subject and i hate it. He likes to comment that I read the wrong books (chick flicks) and I hate it. This whole comment/hate thing can go for pages. So, did I marry the wrong guy who doesn't understand me or all those ladies out there just sugar coat their relationship? This feels like Sex in The City question.
3. I want to feelat least a little bit appreciated and cherished. And maybe he does and just doesn't show it well. I don't need flowers, jewelry, or chocolate, actually scrath that I do need chocolate. A simple Thank You can go a long way. And throw in a few words like "i feel lucky to have you in my life", "thank you for packing my lunch, cooking dinner, doing and folding nicely my laundry and so on" and you'll win my heart all over again.
4. I was raised in Ukraine where the roles for women and men were basically written in our constitution, j/k.
Men = providers, women = raise children, keep the house clean, and have dinner on a table at 6pm with a plate and a fork on a table. My family was a bit different but that is besides the point. But we live in US now. Where women and men share all of the responsibilities. They both earn $, cook, clean, do laundry, raise kids and so on. WTF is wrong in my house? Yes, my income is slightly lower then Mr. V's but I still bring home a significant amount. Why do I have to be the one doing everything around the house? And then I get to hear Mr. V say "but I cook". Yes, dear, you can BBQ once in a blue moon. And my dearest husband is really good at taking the groceries I've bought without telling me and throwing something together. While I should be thankful (because it also happens once a quarter), I feel angry because I've spent hours looking through the recipes online and getting excited a particular one that my whole family would enjoy.
1. (Bare with me...I am a little emotional... it is that time of the month). Mr. V is getting better. Slowly but surely. I don't get to hear a lot of complaining anymore from him. At this point, we can go a day at a time without talking about his hands, ears, back, teeth, etc. But there isn't a day where I want to ask for his help and then stop myself because I know if he'll help then it'll set him back again. It is little things like taking out a garbage, bringing extra chairs for guests, bringing laundry, and so on. Being the only man in the house, I am pretty sure he feels sucky that he can't/shouldn't do any of those stuff. I go on for days thinking I am a super human being and that I can do it all by myself. And then I collapse. I get emotional and stressed out. I understand that in reality I can't do it all and I need help. Believe me, it takes a lot to come to terms with that.
2. I've read quite a few posts on husbands, significant others, and potential husband materials and all of the bloggers mentioned how lucky they are to have husbands, their soul mates, their partners in life and they can't imagine their lives without them. Well, of course I start to question my relationship and no good can come from that, just trust me on that one. Mr. V is a very nice guy. He is smart, handsome (at least I think so), honest, could do all the manual work around the house. BUT...he is not 100% perfect and neither am I. We fight, we quarrel, we get angry with each other and don't let go and forget easily. He likes to tell people how to live their lives and I hate it. He likes to comment on my lack of knowledge on a particular subject and i hate it. He likes to comment that I read the wrong books (chick flicks) and I hate it. This whole comment/hate thing can go for pages. So, did I marry the wrong guy who doesn't understand me or all those ladies out there just sugar coat their relationship? This feels like Sex in The City question.
3. I want to feel
4. I was raised in Ukraine where the roles for women and men were basically written in our constitution, j/k.
Men = providers, women = raise children, keep the house clean, and have dinner on a table at 6pm with a plate and a fork on a table. My family was a bit different but that is besides the point. But we live in US now. Where women and men share all of the responsibilities. They both earn $, cook, clean, do laundry, raise kids and so on. WTF is wrong in my house? Yes, my income is slightly lower then Mr. V's but I still bring home a significant amount. Why do I have to be the one doing everything around the house? And then I get to hear Mr. V say "but I cook". Yes, dear, you can BBQ once in a blue moon. And my dearest husband is really good at taking the groceries I've bought without telling me and throwing something together. While I should be thankful (because it also happens once a quarter), I feel angry because I've spent hours looking through the recipes online and getting excited a particular one that my whole family would enjoy.
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
But Those Are My Words
Lately, my little sunshine has been talking non-stop. It is fun to hear to express herself with words, although every now and then I have to guess what she said. I think she gets a little bit annoyed or just thinks her my is dumb. Relatives and strangers don't even try to understand her. They just look at me for translation.
But anyways, here are a few phrases I've heard in the last few weeks that sounded familiar.
"Mom, shhhh! Daddy is talking on the phone" (Mom, shhh! Papa razgovarivaet) - miss A told me as I was asking her a question and daddy was talking on the phone.
"Mom, don't sing. I sing" (Mom, ne poi! Ya poi) - as soon as I open my mouth to sing a song that she knows, she stops me and wants to sing by herself
"Mom, shhh! Daddy is sleeping" (Mom, shhh! Papa spit) - I've heard this one a few times already, as I sit by her crib and talk to her before she doses off to sleep or if I wake up with her in the morning and daddy is still sleeping.
You know why those phrases sound familiar? Because I've said thema few multiple times before.
I can't believe she is using my words against me! :) At least I don't swear in front of her. Although, the husband and I heard a few times a word "fuck" coming out of her mouth. It went something like that "fuck....pause....fuck, fuck, fuck. The husband and I just starred at each other. I am pretty sure we both blamed each other for her increasing vocabulary (at least I did).
But anyways, here are a few phrases I've heard in the last few weeks that sounded familiar.
"Mom, shhhh! Daddy is talking on the phone" (Mom, shhh! Papa razgovarivaet) - miss A told me as I was asking her a question and daddy was talking on the phone.
"Mom, don't sing. I sing" (Mom, ne poi! Ya poi) - as soon as I open my mouth to sing a song that she knows, she stops me and wants to sing by herself
"Mom, shhh! Daddy is sleeping" (Mom, shhh! Papa spit) - I've heard this one a few times already, as I sit by her crib and talk to her before she doses off to sleep or if I wake up with her in the morning and daddy is still sleeping.
You know why those phrases sound familiar? Because I've said them
I can't believe she is using my words against me! :) At least I don't swear in front of her. Although, the husband and I heard a few times a word "fuck" coming out of her mouth. It went something like that "fuck....pause....fuck, fuck, fuck. The husband and I just starred at each other. I am pretty sure we both blamed each other for her increasing vocabulary (at least I did).
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Thursday Random Thoughts
1. This Thursday really feels like Friday. In fact, Wednesday also felt like Friday.
2. I've been feeling guilty for not spending enough time with my baby girl this whole week. It so happened that the husband would come home earlier or worked from home and was entertaining our little munchkin while I prepared diner, cleaned, prepared lunches for next day, prepared clothes for next day, and so on. It felt nice to get some stuff done before miss A went to bed instead of spending 30-40 minutes after she fell asleep, but she no longer wanted to play with me. She totally became daddy's little girl. They would play together, put puzzles together, color, dance, and play hide under our comforter game (not my idea but she had fun). It is so great to see them play together but I miss her. I miss her running towards me and asking me to play with her. The last few days, she would come to her daddy, grab his hand, say "bye momma", and off they would go.
3. It is my dad's birthday in a few weeks and I can't believe I've waited this long to think about his celebration and gift. He is turning 65 this year. For his 60th, we had a huge party with guest coming over from all over the world. We booked a nice restaurant, I've put together a presentation with photos starting from his childhood until his 60th bday, I've asked guests to sign the custom plate that he would keep for memories. I've designed, printed, and labeled small little vodka bottles as a party favor for all the guests. Honestly, it was like a wedding prep all over. But this year, we won't have guests coming. It'll be just us. I really need to think of something memorable for all of us to do.
4. Thankful for AAA. Last night I had a flat tire. Sucks! AAA came to the rescue though!
5. Tomorrow is a girl's night out and I have want to go but at the same time I don't. As much as I would like to sit around, drink wine, have yummy food in the back of my mind I'll know that I'll need to get up at 7am the following day for miss A's gymnastic class. No way we could skip it. The baby girl waits for it all week long. Plus, random question pop into my head. Do I come home from work? Do I stay at work and ask my parents to pick her up? Sounds like a great idea because I can hit the gym or go shopping before the dinner. But then the guilt creeps in again...
2. I've been feeling guilty for not spending enough time with my baby girl this whole week. It so happened that the husband would come home earlier or worked from home and was entertaining our little munchkin while I prepared diner, cleaned, prepared lunches for next day, prepared clothes for next day, and so on. It felt nice to get some stuff done before miss A went to bed instead of spending 30-40 minutes after she fell asleep, but she no longer wanted to play with me. She totally became daddy's little girl. They would play together, put puzzles together, color, dance, and play hide under our comforter game (not my idea but she had fun). It is so great to see them play together but I miss her. I miss her running towards me and asking me to play with her. The last few days, she would come to her daddy, grab his hand, say "bye momma", and off they would go.
3. It is my dad's birthday in a few weeks and I can't believe I've waited this long to think about his celebration and gift. He is turning 65 this year. For his 60th, we had a huge party with guest coming over from all over the world. We booked a nice restaurant, I've put together a presentation with photos starting from his childhood until his 60th bday, I've asked guests to sign the custom plate that he would keep for memories. I've designed, printed, and labeled small little vodka bottles as a party favor for all the guests. Honestly, it was like a wedding prep all over. But this year, we won't have guests coming. It'll be just us. I really need to think of something memorable for all of us to do.
4. Thankful for AAA. Last night I had a flat tire. Sucks! AAA came to the rescue though!
5. Tomorrow is a girl's night out and I have want to go but at the same time I don't. As much as I would like to sit around, drink wine, have yummy food in the back of my mind I'll know that I'll need to get up at 7am the following day for miss A's gymnastic class. No way we could skip it. The baby girl waits for it all week long. Plus, random question pop into my head. Do I come home from work? Do I stay at work and ask my parents to pick her up? Sounds like a great idea because I can hit the gym or go shopping before the dinner. But then the guilt creeps in again...
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Fast Speed and Stop Sign
The husband and I recently noticed that all of our friends' lives are moving at the speed of light comparing to our family situation. Let's just say we hit the brakes and have been parked on a stop sign for quite some time now.
Let's see...we've been hearing all sort of things happening - getting into a top graduate school, completing Master's degree, buying a house (very nice houses since the prices dropped and it is a good time to buy), buying new cars, boats (yes, you read it correctly, husband's friend bought a boat), getting new jobs, going on luxury vacations and so on. I am not jealous at all. In fact, most of those people deserve all of those great things happening to them. But I can't help but think.....we've had plans too and none of them are coming alive.
1. We've planned on getting a new house but we are stuck. We are upside down on our current house.
2. I've planned on getting into a grad school but lately I've been leaning towards not going that route. I can't work full time and take evening classes. The husband comes home late and can't really do anything because of his medical condition. Who is going to pick up miss A from daycare? Who'll cook? Who'll feed them? Who'll clean-up and wash the dishes? Who'll do laundry? Who'll sleep for me? When will I have time for homework? I do all those chores, some of them daily and some of them weekly, but there is no one else to do them for me.
3. I've planned on getting a new job. Well, as of yesterday I started sending out resumes. At least I've started...
I keep telling myself that my family's health is the most important part and everything else comes after it. It doesn't matter if we get a bigger house, if we buy a new car, if we go to Europe, or if I get a higher paid job. All of those things would be nice but are not a necessity.
Let's see...we've been hearing all sort of things happening - getting into a top graduate school, completing Master's degree, buying a house (very nice houses since the prices dropped and it is a good time to buy), buying new cars, boats (yes, you read it correctly, husband's friend bought a boat), getting new jobs, going on luxury vacations and so on. I am not jealous at all. In fact, most of those people deserve all of those great things happening to them. But I can't help but think.....we've had plans too and none of them are coming alive.
1. We've planned on getting a new house but we are stuck. We are upside down on our current house.
2. I've planned on getting into a grad school but lately I've been leaning towards not going that route. I can't work full time and take evening classes. The husband comes home late and can't really do anything because of his medical condition. Who is going to pick up miss A from daycare? Who'll cook? Who'll feed them? Who'll clean-up and wash the dishes? Who'll do laundry? Who'll sleep for me? When will I have time for homework? I do all those chores, some of them daily and some of them weekly, but there is no one else to do them for me.
3. I've planned on getting a new job. Well, as of yesterday I started sending out resumes. At least I've started...
I keep telling myself that my family's health is the most important part and everything else comes after it. It doesn't matter if we get a bigger house, if we buy a new car, if we go to Europe, or if I get a higher paid job. All of those things would be nice but are not a necessity.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Random Thoughts
1. We've got a little chatter box in our house now. Yes, miss A repeats everything she hears. She tells me how her day went, who she played with at daycare, if she is wearing her big girl underwear, if she pooped today, and so on. All of her stories are told in a very artistic tone, with a lot of acclamation points and articulation. She is my little Hollywood star.
2. Some words are not meant to be repeated. F**K. I don't remember saying it in front of her, but I could've slipped when something didn't go my way. We were getting inside the house and miss A dropped something. She said f**k and picked up her item. The hubs and I looked at each other in shock. I asked him if he heard what I heard. But before he had a chance to reply, my little lady repeated the word 3 more times - f**k, f***k, f**k.
3. The husband called me paranoid and I totally deserve it. After watching the news and reading some articles online, I can't help but get paranoid about something happening to my family. Random questions pop into my head and I just can't help it. What if someone gets into our house? How can I protect miss A? Will I have my phone to call police? Car accident? Earthquake? Lunatics walking on the streets? Maybe I should stop watching/listening to the news for some time...
4. The husband and I went out last Saturday to celebrate our friend's birthday. He had his bday at the new restaurant. It was nice to get out of the house, dress in nice clothes (although I wasn't a big fan of my outfit), socialize with friends, and havetwo three glasses of wine. And did I mentioned dancing? Becase we totally did! Fun times!
5. I think I have a shopping obsession. Online shopping that is. Since I don't have time to go to the store, I tend to buy things online. My cubicle last week was covered in boxes. From toilet paper to shoes...you name it. In fact, I have 4 pairs of shoes in my shoppincg cart right now that I've been thinking of getting...Every time I think I've done enough damage to my bank account, I see something else on sale I want to get.
6. I need to get a haircut. I've been calling my usual hair dresserer but she is not picking up the phone. I've read reviews on yelp but I am afraid to experiment with new people. Last time I did that, I came home crying because he cut my bangs way too short!
7. I've been thinking of doing laser hair removal again. I did it before miss A was born and let's just say some areas of my body NEED to be treated.
2. Some words are not meant to be repeated. F**K. I don't remember saying it in front of her, but I could've slipped when something didn't go my way. We were getting inside the house and miss A dropped something. She said f**k and picked up her item. The hubs and I looked at each other in shock. I asked him if he heard what I heard. But before he had a chance to reply, my little lady repeated the word 3 more times - f**k, f***k, f**k.
3. The husband called me paranoid and I totally deserve it. After watching the news and reading some articles online, I can't help but get paranoid about something happening to my family. Random questions pop into my head and I just can't help it. What if someone gets into our house? How can I protect miss A? Will I have my phone to call police? Car accident? Earthquake? Lunatics walking on the streets? Maybe I should stop watching/listening to the news for some time...
4. The husband and I went out last Saturday to celebrate our friend's birthday. He had his bday at the new restaurant. It was nice to get out of the house, dress in nice clothes (although I wasn't a big fan of my outfit), socialize with friends, and have
5. I think I have a shopping obsession. Online shopping that is. Since I don't have time to go to the store, I tend to buy things online. My cubicle last week was covered in boxes. From toilet paper to shoes...you name it. In fact, I have 4 pairs of shoes in my shoppincg cart right now that I've been thinking of getting...Every time I think I've done enough damage to my bank account, I see something else on sale I want to get.
6. I need to get a haircut. I've been calling my usual hair dresserer but she is not picking up the phone. I've read reviews on yelp but I am afraid to experiment with new people. Last time I did that, I came home crying because he cut my bangs way too short!
7. I've been thinking of doing laser hair removal again. I did it before miss A was born and let's just say some areas of my body NEED to be treated.
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Flashback
As I grabbed my purse, car keys, cell phone, and company checks, I totally forgot to use the restroom. I've parked at the mall where I usually deposit company checks and decided I couldn't hold it anymore. I turned around and went straight to the lady's room. And there, as I locked the door and looked around the dirty "white" walls, I remembered that almost three years ago, I was in the said restroom confirming my BFP by peeing on a digital test that I got next door to Walgreen's and just couldn't wait to pee on. Sorry for TMI but it is my blog and I can totally write what I want :)
I remember all kind of feelings rushing through by body - fear, excitement, anticipation... I remember walking back to work and looking back at the magical word PREGNANT and I just couldn't stop smiling. I didn't care if people on the street thought I was crazy. I was happy. It was one of the most memorable days in my life.
I remember all kind of feelings rushing through by body - fear, excitement, anticipation... I remember walking back to work and looking back at the magical word PREGNANT and I just couldn't stop smiling. I didn't care if people on the street thought I was crazy. I was happy. It was one of the most memorable days in my life.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
I am emotional and depressed right now.
Lately, I've been hearing a lot of phrases like "_____ person is in the hospital", "_____ person has a life threatening sickness", and "_____ person passed away".
As I type this blog, husband's grandfather is in the hospital and will most likely stay there. At this point the doctors can't really do anything. Mind you he is 102. I realize not a lot of people are fortunate to live that many years. But I can't help to get sad. I've known this person for over 8 years. I've seen this person on every family occasion. I've witnessed this person get old.
Lately, some of our friends and acquaintances have lost loved ones. It breaks my heart and always brings tears to my eyes. I don't know...I just don't want to even think about going through something like that. I am crying now... and don't even want to type my thoughts because it creeps me out.
Lately, I've been hearing a lot of phrases like "_____ person is in the hospital", "_____ person has a life threatening sickness", and "_____ person passed away".
As I type this blog, husband's grandfather is in the hospital and will most likely stay there. At this point the doctors can't really do anything. Mind you he is 102. I realize not a lot of people are fortunate to live that many years. But I can't help to get sad. I've known this person for over 8 years. I've seen this person on every family occasion. I've witnessed this person get old.
Lately, some of our friends and acquaintances have lost loved ones. It breaks my heart and always brings tears to my eyes. I don't know...I just don't want to even think about going through something like that. I am crying now... and don't even want to type my thoughts because it creeps me out.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Thursday Random Thoughts
1. Why do I offer and why do people get advantage.
I've asked my brother last week if they needed help with my niece's 1st bday party. They've ordered catering but asked my mom and myself to cook some stuff as well.
Bro: "So, can you make xachapuri (piroshki with cheese) for the party?"
Me: "Sure. How many?"
Bro: "100"
Me: giggling "That is not funny. Really, how many do you need?"
Bro: "I was not kidding"
I thought a whole of 2 minutes, did the calculation, and replied back saying that I won't be able to make that many. It'll take me 4-5 hours to make 100 pieces. Plus, having a toddler who needs to eat, play, and constantly be entertained.... no way jose.
2. Why do I do this to myself?
I started reading blogs that I follow and sometimes I click on other blogs just to see. I start reading about the pregancy difficulties, terrifying birth stories, children born with special conditions. I freak myself out. I know we don't live in a perfect world and we all have difficulties in life, but every time I read those stories it terrifies me, freaks the shit out of me, and makes me depressed and sorry for those people. And to be honest, I am afraid of those things happening to me. And after those sad thoughts, I don't know if I want to go through another pregnancy.
3. Why is it still dark outside at 5pm?
I am so tired of winter time. Even though it is not cold in Bay Area, it is dark after I get off work and pick up miss A from daycare. We can't go to a playground, park, or to the lake to feed the birds. We usually go home and miss A needs to be entertained. A few hours of being home, my house looks like a tornado just went through it.
4. We've been invited to a bday party. I have a few options - check my closet for an outfit or go shopping. I think like any other girl I'll choose the shopping.
5. As I mentioned earlier, it is my niece's 1st bday party this Sunday. I just looked at the evite list and my "dearest" cousin replied that he is coming. Never mind, that he hasn't yet met miss A and she turned two already. Don't even get me started. At this point, I don't even know how to act around him and his family.
6. I want a clean house. How do I get it? We've hired a cleaning lady and she's been at our house twice already. But I don't feel like it is clean. I feel the urge to clean two days after they come.
7. I want a wife. Yes, a wife who'll be doing things for me, care for me, cook dinner for me, pick up after me, do laundry for me, and so on. I would love to have a full time wife (or assistant). Wouldn't life be easier?
8. I've got work to do but I am soooooo unmotivated.
9. Miss A gets bored with her ToyRUs at home and I am running out of ideas how to entertain her. We usually color, watch cartoons, play with stickers, read books. Lately, her obsession has been a Toy Story puzzle that I picked up at Walgreens for $0.14 cents after Christmas. Who needs expensive toys when you've got super cheap puzzles? She puts it together in 4-5 minutes and then takes the pieces out, rinse and repeat 10 more times.
10. I keep reminding myself to sink in every minute of life and people around. I keep telling myself to be optimistic. It is definitely an area I need to work on. I need to find my happy place.
I've asked my brother last week if they needed help with my niece's 1st bday party. They've ordered catering but asked my mom and myself to cook some stuff as well.
Bro: "So, can you make xachapuri (piroshki with cheese) for the party?"
Me: "Sure. How many?"
Bro: "100"
Me: giggling "That is not funny. Really, how many do you need?"
Bro: "I was not kidding"
I thought a whole of 2 minutes, did the calculation, and replied back saying that I won't be able to make that many. It'll take me 4-5 hours to make 100 pieces. Plus, having a toddler who needs to eat, play, and constantly be entertained.... no way jose.
2. Why do I do this to myself?
I started reading blogs that I follow and sometimes I click on other blogs just to see. I start reading about the pregancy difficulties, terrifying birth stories, children born with special conditions. I freak myself out. I know we don't live in a perfect world and we all have difficulties in life, but every time I read those stories it terrifies me, freaks the shit out of me, and makes me depressed and sorry for those people. And to be honest, I am afraid of those things happening to me. And after those sad thoughts, I don't know if I want to go through another pregnancy.
3. Why is it still dark outside at 5pm?
I am so tired of winter time. Even though it is not cold in Bay Area, it is dark after I get off work and pick up miss A from daycare. We can't go to a playground, park, or to the lake to feed the birds. We usually go home and miss A needs to be entertained. A few hours of being home, my house looks like a tornado just went through it.
4. We've been invited to a bday party. I have a few options - check my closet for an outfit or go shopping. I think like any other girl I'll choose the shopping.
5. As I mentioned earlier, it is my niece's 1st bday party this Sunday. I just looked at the evite list and my "dearest" cousin replied that he is coming. Never mind, that he hasn't yet met miss A and she turned two already. Don't even get me started. At this point, I don't even know how to act around him and his family.
6. I want a clean house. How do I get it? We've hired a cleaning lady and she's been at our house twice already. But I don't feel like it is clean. I feel the urge to clean two days after they come.
7. I want a wife. Yes, a wife who'll be doing things for me, care for me, cook dinner for me, pick up after me, do laundry for me, and so on. I would love to have a full time wife (or assistant). Wouldn't life be easier?
8. I've got work to do but I am soooooo unmotivated.
9. Miss A gets bored with her ToyRUs at home and I am running out of ideas how to entertain her. We usually color, watch cartoons, play with stickers, read books. Lately, her obsession has been a Toy Story puzzle that I picked up at Walgreens for $0.14 cents after Christmas. Who needs expensive toys when you've got super cheap puzzles? She puts it together in 4-5 minutes and then takes the pieces out, rinse and repeat 10 more times.
10. I keep reminding myself to sink in every minute of life and people around. I keep telling myself to be optimistic. It is definitely an area I need to work on. I need to find my happy place.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Thursday Random Thoughts
I've read a few blogs where people just list random thoughts on Thursday and I kind of like the idea, especially since I can't commit to post regularly and have quite a few thoughts currently on my mind.
1. I am emotionally, mentally, and a bit physically tired. The husband has been diagnosed with TOS a few months back. His hands would go numb at night and would hurt when he would lift heavy stuff. After countless amount of doctor's appointments and spending a few grand of $$$, they were finally able to tell he has TOS. I am not going to go into details about it but basically he can't lift heavy items (ex: our daughter, grocery bags, garbage, and so on). He basically can't do anything around the house and pretty much everything falls on me. I am not really complaining. I want him to get better but don't really know how long it'll take. The docs say if he'll continue the physical therapy, doing exercises at home, and acupuncture then it can take up to a year...
2. I am tired...I don't know if I am strong enough...It is definitely feels like a test for me, for him, and for our relationship.
3. Miss A is my little miracle that keeps me going. She is charming, caring, sympathetic, and is turning into such a cute little lady.
4. My BIL and SIL welcomed their second boy on 12/12/11. It is so nice to see their family grow. We know have 2 nephews and one niece.
5. I've been having thoughts about having a second child. I definitely want to have another one but at this point in life, I don't really know if it'll be possible (see #1). If the husband won't get better, then my dreams of having 2 or 3 kids and moving into a bigger house will stay as dreams only and will never turn into reality.
6. This probably should be part of #5 but when I see a pregnant women I get mixed feelings. I am not really a big fan of the whole 9 month pregnancy, 4 months of throwing up, waking up at night to pee multiple times, and the constant worry about the baby inside being healthy. But... but I do love seeing babies born, family growing from three to four, seeing pictures of brother and sisters playing together, and so on. I really hope we'll get a chance to become parents again. Maybe if I'll really believe in it then it'll happen.
7. I can't wrap my head around that it is 2012. Wow... days, weeks, months turn into a year and before I realize that year is gone.
8. I should probably start looking for another job. I am glad to have a job but I don't feel motivated or challenged. Some days would fly by but I can count those days on my fingers on one hand.
9. I really hope my Mom will find a job. She has been unemployed for almost two years. She helped us out and watched miss A after I returned to work and now has been really looking for a job for the last 5 months. It is making her depressed and worried and I don't like seeing her like that.
10. I wish I would have a magical wand to make every one's (well, almost every one's) problems disappear.
Well, there you have it - my random thoughts for today.
1. I am emotionally, mentally, and a bit physically tired. The husband has been diagnosed with TOS a few months back. His hands would go numb at night and would hurt when he would lift heavy stuff. After countless amount of doctor's appointments and spending a few grand of $$$, they were finally able to tell he has TOS. I am not going to go into details about it but basically he can't lift heavy items (ex: our daughter, grocery bags, garbage, and so on). He basically can't do anything around the house and pretty much everything falls on me. I am not really complaining. I want him to get better but don't really know how long it'll take. The docs say if he'll continue the physical therapy, doing exercises at home, and acupuncture then it can take up to a year...
2. I am tired...I don't know if I am strong enough...It is definitely feels like a test for me, for him, and for our relationship.
3. Miss A is my little miracle that keeps me going. She is charming, caring, sympathetic, and is turning into such a cute little lady.
4. My BIL and SIL welcomed their second boy on 12/12/11. It is so nice to see their family grow. We know have 2 nephews and one niece.
5. I've been having thoughts about having a second child. I definitely want to have another one but at this point in life, I don't really know if it'll be possible (see #1). If the husband won't get better, then my dreams of having 2 or 3 kids and moving into a bigger house will stay as dreams only and will never turn into reality.
6. This probably should be part of #5 but when I see a pregnant women I get mixed feelings. I am not really a big fan of the whole 9 month pregnancy, 4 months of throwing up, waking up at night to pee multiple times, and the constant worry about the baby inside being healthy. But... but I do love seeing babies born, family growing from three to four, seeing pictures of brother and sisters playing together, and so on. I really hope we'll get a chance to become parents again. Maybe if I'll really believe in it then it'll happen.
7. I can't wrap my head around that it is 2012. Wow... days, weeks, months turn into a year and before I realize that year is gone.
8. I should probably start looking for another job. I am glad to have a job but I don't feel motivated or challenged. Some days would fly by but I can count those days on my fingers on one hand.
9. I really hope my Mom will find a job. She has been unemployed for almost two years. She helped us out and watched miss A after I returned to work and now has been really looking for a job for the last 5 months. It is making her depressed and worried and I don't like seeing her like that.
10. I wish I would have a magical wand to make every one's (well, almost every one's) problems disappear.
Well, there you have it - my random thoughts for today.
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