Well, I had my second acupuncture appointment yesterday. I have to say I was much more relaxed this time that I fell asleep. I had more needles in me this time but none of them were painful. I am still not sure if it'll help me with TTC but I guess it is worth a try.
Lately, I just feel like I am jumping into everything that can help me to get KU. I read stuff on GP or hear at work how this and that helped people to get KU and I want to start it right away.
I've been telling myself that six months of TTC is not that bad and I shouldn't be worried, but I can't help to think that there is something wrong with me. The acupuncturist told me that in Western medicine they only start using the word infertility if the couple has been trying for over 2 years and that I am still a "young chicken" in TTC journey. But come on! It is hard to wait and get disappointed every month. I feel like my life has changed into a waiting game. I am constantly waiting for something....waiting hours between green tea and taking PV, waiting till moring to see the temp on BBT, waiting to O, waiting to see CH on the chart, waiting to test, waiting for AF to end so that we can start again. I wish TTC would be easie. I wish I would be more prepared for this long journey.
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
I wish I would know...
that eventually I'll get my BFP! We saw the BIL and SIL and their cutest baby yesterday. He is a little bit over a year and such a happy little boy. It is impossible not to have a smile around him. But DH looked a bit sad yesterday. I kept looking at him yesterday and I knew what he was thinking about. And here I thought I was the only one obsessing about TTC journey. Since cycle #7 started, I can't stop thinking that I am failing Mr. V and myself. I am blaming myself (even though I know it is stupid) for not being KU yet. Is there really someting wrong with me? I am trying to be optimistic, but I am only human, and of course have my down times. I wish I would know that one day, hopefully very, very soon, I'll get my very own BFP!
Monday, January 19, 2009
The Weekend!
I thought my three day weekend would never come. It is so hard to work for five days in a row after the holidays (I know I am being spoiled). But the weekend finally came and I had a blast.
Friday:
One of my close girlfriends is leaving to UK for 4 months to study abroad. So, we spent the whole day together. Our breakfast with two mimosas was followed by a frozen yogurt, some shopping, and a movie (Bride Wars), oh and frozen yogurt again for me. After the movie and some more shopping, I told her that I wanted to stop by at the restaurant where Mr. V was with his friend. Little did she know, that it was actully her going away surprise party!!! I wish I had a camera to take a picture of her face when she saw 20 familiar faces all staring at her and yelling SURPRISE!!! It was priceless. I'll miss you D very, very much!
Saturday:
Mr. V, BIL, SIL, and I went ice-skating. I forgot the last time I had to put the skates on. After a couple of minutes of my legs going different ways and one circle of not letting go of the rail, I finally felt more comfortable on ice. DH is a much better skater then I am and of course he had to show off :) We skated together but the only thing that was going through my mind was famous words from Titanic, "don't you let go, don't you ever let go". After couple of falls later, we grabbed some yummy Indian food and watched Defiance in a theater. It is definitely a hard movie to watch. It would be third on the list of difficult movies after Shiendler's List and Anne Frank's diaries.
Sunday: Mr. V and I cleaned the house. DH's friends came over for diner. Thanks, friends, for leaving so late and not letting me to get my beauty sleep.
I hope everyone had a great weekend!
Friday:
One of my close girlfriends is leaving to UK for 4 months to study abroad. So, we spent the whole day together. Our breakfast with two mimosas was followed by a frozen yogurt, some shopping, and a movie (Bride Wars), oh and frozen yogurt again for me. After the movie and some more shopping, I told her that I wanted to stop by at the restaurant where Mr. V was with his friend. Little did she know, that it was actully her going away surprise party!!! I wish I had a camera to take a picture of her face when she saw 20 familiar faces all staring at her and yelling SURPRISE!!! It was priceless. I'll miss you D very, very much!
Saturday:
Mr. V, BIL, SIL, and I went ice-skating. I forgot the last time I had to put the skates on. After a couple of minutes of my legs going different ways and one circle of not letting go of the rail, I finally felt more comfortable on ice. DH is a much better skater then I am and of course he had to show off :) We skated together but the only thing that was going through my mind was famous words from Titanic, "don't you let go, don't you ever let go". After couple of falls later, we grabbed some yummy Indian food and watched Defiance in a theater. It is definitely a hard movie to watch. It would be third on the list of difficult movies after Shiendler's List and Anne Frank's diaries.
Sunday: Mr. V and I cleaned the house. DH's friends came over for diner. Thanks, friends, for leaving so late and not letting me to get my beauty sleep.
I hope everyone had a great weekend!
Monday, January 12, 2009
Intro...
I am 26 years old. Mr. V (DH) and I recently celebrated our six year anniversary and out of those six years, we've been happily married for seven months.
We both wanted an addition to our family and started TTC a month after the wedding. Being naive and uneducated, I thought we would get our BFP within couple of months. Boy, was I wrong? AF showed her face every month and I started to wonder if getting KU was harder then I thought. I started researching online and opened up a whole new world for me when I signed up on thebump.com. I looked through all of the boards available and quickly decided that I belong to GP board. After lurking for some time, I introduced myself and began asking questions like every other newbie.
I like being part of the GP board, even though I mostly lurk. It is a place where ladies can relate and understand what you are going through. I love when regular GP girls get their BFPs. I am extremely happy for them and it also gives me hope that one day we'll get lucky and see a second line on the test.
Fast forward to January 2009...
We are on cycle #7 and so far no BFP for us. I honestly never thought we would be where we are right now. I've been charting for six cycles, using the CBEFM for one month (I always missed the window with OPKs), taking PNVs, and trying to be as healthy as I can.
I have my ups and downs every month. One day, I feel like TTC is becoming an obsession and is taking over my life. And next day (just like today) I am feeling optimistic that next cycle will be our lucky one.
We both wanted an addition to our family and started TTC a month after the wedding. Being naive and uneducated, I thought we would get our BFP within couple of months. Boy, was I wrong? AF showed her face every month and I started to wonder if getting KU was harder then I thought. I started researching online and opened up a whole new world for me when I signed up on thebump.com. I looked through all of the boards available and quickly decided that I belong to GP board. After lurking for some time, I introduced myself and began asking questions like every other newbie.
I like being part of the GP board, even though I mostly lurk. It is a place where ladies can relate and understand what you are going through. I love when regular GP girls get their BFPs. I am extremely happy for them and it also gives me hope that one day we'll get lucky and see a second line on the test.
Fast forward to January 2009...
We are on cycle #7 and so far no BFP for us. I honestly never thought we would be where we are right now. I've been charting for six cycles, using the CBEFM for one month (I always missed the window with OPKs), taking PNVs, and trying to be as healthy as I can.
I have my ups and downs every month. One day, I feel like TTC is becoming an obsession and is taking over my life. And next day (just like today) I am feeling optimistic that next cycle will be our lucky one.
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