Update on HSG

I've been calling some hospitals and clinics to see if they do HSG and to get an idea of the average price for the test. Couple of phone calls later, I realized that all of the hospitals charge about the same price - $1,500-$3500, depending on how much of the iodine they would be using. At the end, I found one clinic 30 minutes away from my house that does the test for only $760 without insurance. I had to ask the lady couple of times if I heard the price correctly. DH and I decided that/if AF shows, then I'll do the HSG in March.
What a reality check? I have to admit I never thought of actually getting this test done. For some reason, I was soooo sure that a miracle would happen and I would get my BFP before any further testing. I am not afraid of pain. I am afraid of the unknown. I am afraid that there will be something wrong with me and I will need to do even more testing. I am trying to stay calm and not to think about it for couple of more weeks. My motto for now is "we'll cross that bridge when we come to it."

People should leave me alone!

Seriously, at least for a while. My older brother AIMed (is that even a word?) me yesterday and asked for a ride home. I hate it how he only calls or texts me when he needs something and I am getting tired of being the first to call. Anyways, so we are in the car having a conversation:
Bro: "So, when are you thinking of having a little one?"
Me: " Oh, I already have one, it is DH. I feed him, clean after him, do his laundry. He is my little kid!"
Bro: "What about another one?"
Me: "Well, I don't know. We'll see how it goes."
Bro: "Well, are you thinking within the next couple of years?"
(I am thinking more like now)
Me: "We'll see"
Bro: "Since K and I are expecting, I was thinking it would be nice to have our kids close in age."
Me: "Hmmm... do you want to decide on the gender of my baby too? Should I have a boy or a girl just to make you happy?"

What a fcuk? I am sick of people asking me about our baby plans. Am I all up in your business? Am I telling you how to live your life? No!
He doesn't know what I am going through every month and I'll keep it that way. I don't want him or anyone else feeling sorry for me. I don't want his wife to call of her friends with babies and tell them we are having problems. I don't want his wife to calculate what will be the difference in years, days, hours, and minutes between our kids. (She freaking calculates everything. Apparently, there are 84 days between our weddings based on her calculations. Get a life!)
Anyways, it was a bit annoying. Just when I am trying to forget about TTC someone always brings it up.

As for TTC world, today is 7 DPO. I am having my usually AF cramps, so probably this cycle will end with another BFN.

My Dream

After the alarm went off, it took me couple of minutes to realize that I've been dreaming. I've had a very vivid dream last night, which doesn't happen to me a lot. I remember every detail of the dream where I got my BFP. I was in my bathroon and I peed on a $tree test and saw a second line. I was shocked and in disbelief that the day finally came when I saw the second pink line on the test. I didn't tell Mr. V at that point because I was speechless and still shocked. Just to double check (so typical of me), I peed on 2 more regular test and saw the lines again. I started jumpind up and down in the bathroom and then showed the test to Mr. V. The dream was fading away at that point but I remember my last words. Mr V. and I looked at each other and I said, "so, what do we do now?"
Dream do come true, right? I mean, I haven't even Od yet, but maybe, just maybe, it'll happen soon.

My Favorite Thing

I think I found my heaven. I mean, I knew I liked chocolate but this is something I can eat everyday and not get sick of it. Ladies and gentelman, let me present you for the first time (in this blog) the Vietnamese chocolate cake!




"Heavenly chocolate cake flavored with Vietnamese coffee, topped with whipped cream and an almond shortbread cookie"
I had this out-of-this-world cake over VD diner on Saturday. We've been to this restaurant quite a few times before, but I never ordered deserts. This time, I decided to treat myself. Is it bad that I didn't want to share with Mr. V? I wanted to have it all to myself, but being a nice wifey I shared. Overall, it was a holiday. But next time, I am ordering one just one for moi and NO sharing.
Honestly, sometimes I feel like I will do anything for chocolate.

As for the TTC world, today is CD38 and I think my body is finally ready to O. I hope it is not just playing tricks with me. Let's just hope Mr.V will be in a mood for some "sexy time". I won't bore you with my chart. It really doesn't look very impressive.

Insurance Vent

So, yesterday I finally had a chance to email my insurance company and ask if they'll cover HSG procedure. After an hour of being on the phone with the hospital and getting the billing code, I get an answer from the insurance company. And guess what? With my luck, HSG is not covered. I would have to pay for it out of the pocket. Oh, and to make things even "better", HSG cost went up since January 2009. Now, instead of $2,500 it costs $3,500 just for the procedure not including the doctor's labor. I can't say that I am pissed off, I guess I am just disappointed. I mean, people pay so much money for health insurance monthly and yet it doesn't cover everything. I am not in a rush to do the test. We wanted to wait couple of more months. But now, I don't even know when/if I'll do it. Maybe, just maybe, we'll get our BFP and I won't have to do that scary test. Keeping my fingers crossed!

Come out, come out

where ever you are! Yes, ewcm I am talking about you. Where they hell are you? It is CD 25 today and I am still not getting any wcm. Usually, I get some watery cm before I O, but as of now I only put C on my FF chart. I guess O is not going to happen for another couple of days (if it'll happen at all this cycle, I am kind of loosing hope and I am giving up on this cycle). I am tired of going to the bathroom and banding down to check if I have any ewcm (sorry for TMI).


And monitor, what is up with you nowdays? How come I am getting High for almost two weeks now? Some of the GP girls said they got Highs for 10-14 days and only then it went to Peak. The first month of using CBEFM was perfect, by the book. I got 3 Highs and 2 Peak days and now it is all wrong! I can forget about testing on VD, since I am not even sure if I'll O by that time. Fun times!
So, let's make a deal. I'll continue drinking green tea everyday and all I need from you, ewcm, just to show up. Please, pretty please!