Thursday, February 11, 2010

I used to be that girl

That girl who loved and enjoyed:
-putting make up everyday (foundation and eye liner)
-blow dry my hair after each wash and occasionally straighten them
-dress up nicely for work
-go shopping on a weekday just because I could
-wear heels everyday
-wear sweats only to the gym and around the house with a matching top
-got mani and pedi every two weeks

And now since our little princess arrived, I feel like a totally different person. I just don't have enough time for myself anymore.

Let's see how it all changed:
-I still try to put make up everyday, especially since I returned to work. when I stayed at home with Ariela, I didn't have time nor strength for make-up.
-Blow dryer, what is that? Seriously, I forgot I had one.
-Yeah, so about that. Since I still can't fit into everything and haven't bought myself any new pair of pants (for motivation to loose weight), I can only fit into two pairs of jeans. Also, my closet is now in Ariela's room. I know, I know... our house is roomy but it definitely doesn't have enough closets. So, I have to prepare my clothes from the night before and honestly it is been pretty easy since I really can't wear a lot with jeans.
-Shopping...let's just skip that painful subject right now. I am waiting till I can fit into my regular size 2-4 pants. Plus, I am always in a hurry to get home so my mom can get some rest and go home.
-For the last two months, all I wore were sneakers. I started wearing little heels to work but nothing comparing to what I wore before. I am afraid I'll loose balance caring my bag, my lunch, and my pump.
-Again, for the last couple of months that is all.i.wore. I can't imagine my life without them now. I would start the day with a matching top but then I would need to change my tops a few times per day because of the spit ups and other fun spills.
-I did manage to escape out of the house for mani and pedi just once before New Years. That is right, if you can't count, I haven't done them in almost two months. I try not to look at my toes and it is easy now since I wear socks all the time in this weather. But my hands is a totally different story. I always try to hide them when I am around people. I am noticing people staring at my nails at work. Maybe, just maybe I am being paranoid. But all of the girls at work used to compliment me on my nails before and now they probably think I turned into that Mom who doesn't take care of herself. But that is a story for another blog post.

Sunday, January 24, 2010

A Trip To Remember

Today we went to wish Mr. V's mom Happy Birthday. She celebrated her 60th birthday in a very nice buffet with lots of champagne and great jazz music. It was Ariela's first trip to the restaurant. We would leave her with my parents but they were invited as well.

We were an hour late, since our little princess decided to do her business (#2) right when we were ready to leave. So she was back on the changing table :)

When we got to the restaurant Ariela was sleeping for the first 30 minutes. She gave us some time to say hello to everyone and to grab some food. Then it was her time to eat. By the way, she is still not a good eater. So, there she was, drinking her milk and doing her business again (#2) while she was on my lap. At that time, Mr. V's mom decided that it was time to take a picture of the whole gang. Ariela took a little break and posed for the picture. The guy who took the picture started counting 3, 2, 1 and right when he said 1, Ariela started crying so loud that a lot of people in the restaurant could hear. We got back to our sits and Ariela continued with her feast. And again, she was continuing with her business (#2) while she was eating on my laps. All of a sudden, my fingers feel warm and wet and they kind of smelled. What do you know, my little princess got not only herself dirty but her momma as well.

I quickly called Mr. V. He grabbed the diaper bag and the waiter showed us an empty private room where we could change Ariela, since they didn't have the changing station in the bathroom (which by the way is a little annoying. I think each restaurant should have one, especially now that I have a kid :) ). I was thankful that I had another outfit in the diaper bag, because her new Gap leggings and a cute onesie were all DIRTY. We quickly changed her and went back to the guests like nothing happened. I was also thankful that I wore black pants and no one could see a little mark Ariela left on them.

Over all, I realized how hard it is to go out with a baby. You have to get yourself and the baby ready, refill the diaper bag, make sure you have enough diapers, wipes, food, clothes, extra paci and a blanket. Then you have to leave the house in the time interval when your baby is not hungry, otherwise you are stuck for another 30 minutes. Then comes the driving, which is relatively easy since Ariela falls asleep in the car almost all the time. Then at the restaurant you can't just relax, enjoy the food and the atmosphere. I felt like I was always in a hurry. I am eating much faster, constantly looking if the baby is asleep, constantly looking at the clock if it is time for her to eat or sleep or if I need to start warming up the her milk/formula.

Today was definitely a trip to remember. Next time, I am taking two additional sets of clothes for Ariela and maybe one for me :)

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Tick Tock

Ariela turned 2 months a few days ago. It feels like she has been part of my life for a much longer period than 2 months. I can't even picture my life without her now. We are going for her 2 month appointment next week. She'll be getting a few more shots, hopefully, she'll just cry for couple of seconds like last time. I am curious to see how much she weights right now and how tall she is. I think she is about 12 pounds right now, although sometimes she feels much heavier (also sometimes she pees a few times into her diaper before I can change it and that big heavy diaper makes her weight even more).

For the last week she hasn't been eating that much. I should probably correct myself. She'll eat about 3oz and then she'll stop and wouldn't take the bottle anymore. She'll start to turn her head right and left and sometimes she would start crying if I push her to eat more. It is like she is saying "mom, can't you understand? I am full". But being a mother who spends her time googling things about eating and new development for each week/month, I am trying to make her eat a little more. I read that at 2 months, babies should be eating between 4-6oz. So, now we have a deal with her. She'll eat her 3oz, I'll burp her and sometimes I'll change her so she wouldn't fall asleep, and then I'll feed her another 1-2 oz. And it works! You live, you learn. She'll finish the rest of her feeding. Yes, it does take about 40 minutes now for each feeding but at least I know she is getting the right amount of milk/formula.

And now for the updates:
-Ariela's favorite songs are "Ot ulibki" and "Kapitan" (we talk and sing to her in Russian). Both songs have the words ulibki (smiles) in them and she always smiles when we sings those songs.
-she makes the cutest sounds like "ga", "gu", "a".
-she smiles every time she wakes up and sees us.
-she recognizes her grandparents and smiles at them.
-Ariela still doesn't like her tummy time that much, she'll only last 3-4 minutes
-she started to fall asleep on her own. I swaddle her and put her in her crib, give her a paci and sometimes she falls asleep all by herself.
-she'll cry if she can't fall asleep.
-Ariela started to hold on to things with her tiny little fingers
-she is more alert and more active during the day, although she likes to nap every 2-3 hours.
-it takes her about 30 minutes to be fully awake in the morning. She'll wake up, then fall back asleep for couple of minutes and that will continue for about half an hour (she totally got that from me, or should I say from pre-baby me).

Friday, January 15, 2010

Work?

I can't believe it is been almost 9 weeks of my maternity leave. I still have a little over 3 weeks. My boss expects me to be back mid February but I was thinking of staying home for another couple of weeks without pay.
I just thanked my boss over IM for a gift card that I received over the holidays and he mentioned that we'll need to talk next week about my return. Now I am sitting here with teary eyes and thinking that I'll need to leave my baby girl for a whole day. I think the longest I left her was 5 hours. Mr. V, MIL, SIL and I went to see Avatar and left Ariela with my parents. I was sooo excited on the drive to my parent's house to see my girl. But soon I would need to leave for almost 11 hours. And now I am not just teary, I am crying. Seriously, I wish I could work part time but I don't think my work would allow it and I wouldn't be able to finish everything in 20-25 hours. Sucks!
Who do I leave her with? I wish I could stay home for another 4-5 months until she is a bit older. But I would probably loose my job and it would be really hard to find another job in the near future. My mom will soon find out if she will be on unemployment soon or if she'll return to work. I now it is really selfish of me, but I wish she would be getting unemployment and watch Ariela. Mr. V and I would be adding some $$$ to her unemployment. That would be the best! I would still be sad leaving my baby girl for a whole day but at least I would know she is in good hands. I can't imagine her attending daycare just yet. Plus, I am sure every mother has her ways of taking care of her baby and daycare just wouldn't be the same. Oh decisions, decisions.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Things to Remember

I realize that I don't have time to blog often and I am way behind on updating all of the facts and other random things that I don't want to forget. So here it goes:

1. Ariela's appetite is increasing with every week. First month she could only eat 2 oz at each feeding and now she eats between 3-4oz. We are still substituting with formula since I don't have enough milk. So for now she is been getting 50/50. I was at first mad and disappointed at myself that I don't have enough milk for my baby girl since all of the vitamins that she needs are in it, but then I realized that there is nothing I can do about it. We picked a really good formula that has a lot of the stuff that she needs.
2. Ariela's umbilical cord stump fell of on the 13th day, just like the doctor said (within first 2 weeks).
3. Ariela had her first bath at two weeks. And now we are bathing her every other day. She cried the first couple of times but now she seems to enjoy it. We talk and sing to her while she is in the tub. She probably thinks her parents are already sooo weird.
4. During the third week, my parents had to leave to Israel and we had to babysit Mickey. Well, it wasn't easy taking care of a dog and a newborn, especially when Mickey would start barking and Ariela would start crying at the same time. But during those 10 days, Ariela was making noises like a puppy, saying "af, af, af, af". It was adorable. I've noticed that she stopped right after my parents picked up Mickey.
5. I caught Ariela's first smile on 12/04/09. It melted my heart. Of course by the time I got my camera to capture her beautiful smile, our lady wasn't in a mood anymore. Now, she is smiling more often. Usually, we can get a few smiles when we sing to her and in the morning when she wakes up.
6. Ariela loves her changing table. She'll usually stop crying when we put her on the changing pad and will start looking around at us and at her surroundings. She also loves being without a diaper on, but that can only last for a little while, since we don't want any "accidents" :).
7. Speaking of a little "accidents", Ariela officially pooped and peed on me.
She pooped while I was wiping her butt. I guess she wasn't done with her business :)
And she peed on me when we were at the doctor's office for her one month check up appointment and shots.
8. Ariela and I went together to her doctor's visits three times already (just us girls). Every time in a way it gets easier. First, I dress myself and put a little make up to look decent in public. Then I change and dress Ariela, put her in a car seat, grab the diaper bag, and off we go.
9. Ariela had her first shot at 5 weeks (little late for one months appointment). I was holding her while the doctor sticked the needle. I decided not to look since it freaked me out that my baby will be poked with that big needle. I wish I could take that pain for her. She cried for 5 seconds and then calmed down. I was expecting her crying all the way to the house :)
10. Today, I put her on her stomach for a little tummy time. She was holding her head (she is been great at holding her head from the hospital) at 45 degrees angle and looking at me. Then she turned her head and then the rest of her body and she was on her back! I couldn't believe that she turned all by herself. She did it twice in a row and decided that it was enough (couldn't capture it on camera).

This is it for now. I am sure I'll think of more stuff :)

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Weight

Our baby girl left the hospital weighing 7lbs. At the first appointment, on her fourth day, she weighted 6lbs 10oz and the doctor wanted us to come in again in a few days to weigh her again. Next time, she weighted 6lbs 9oz. I was freaking out and almost started to cry at the doctor's office. The doctor informed me that we were doing everything right by the amounts of wet diapers Ariela had, but that we should try to increase the amount of milk/formula she was getting. Since I don't have enough milk, we give her some formula as well. Since we starting feeding her more, she was less fussier and slept better. If only I knew that it was all that we needed to do.

At the last appointment (last week), she weighted 7lbs 15oz. Yeay!!!

Birth Story

After we got admitted to the hospital at 3:30 on November 15, things moved relatively fast. We settled in our room by 4:30 and I got hooked up to the external monitors for baby's heart rate and my contractions. I didn't want to get the epidural right away since then I would spend the rest of the labor in bed. So, Mr. V and I decided to go walk around. He called our parents to let them know that we finally got admitted while I was stopping every few minutes and waiting for the contraction to be over. We walked for 25 minutes and came back to a room where I was again hooked up to the monitors. The nurse (who was also a lawyer as we later found out) was very nice and answered all of our questions. The doctor who was on duty that night wanted to break my water to speed things up. I decided to get an epidural at that time and only after let them break my water. The anesthesiologist was supposed to come within 30 minutes. I kept telling myself that 30 minutes should be a piece of cake after couple of days of that pain. The hospital had couple of emergency c-section and I had to wait for my drugs. After an hour of waiting, I was done. I was so ready to be poked. I was tired and exhausted from the pain. I kept looking at the monitor every time I had a contraction and I would see the numbers around 110-120, those were some painful cx.

Finally, the anesthesiologist came in. Mr. V could stay in a room but he couldn't watch what they were doing, he had to face me. I wasn't afraid of the needle. I was more afraid of getting a painful cx during the procedure and not being able to move. And that is exactly what happened. As the guy was poking me in the back, I had to sit still through a cx. I squeezed the pillow and listened to a nurse who was telling me I was doing great and that it was almost over. And indeed it was over after 10 minutes. I got comfortable in my bed and the nurse asked me if I was feeling cx at that point. I was surprised she asked me that since she could see from the monitor that I didn't have one yet. But I was wrong.
Nurse: Honey, can you feel the cx?
Me: What cx? I didn't have one yet.
Nurse: You are having one right now.
Me: Really?...shocked face...pause for feeling stupid and not getting the epi earlier.

The anesthesiologist told me I did great and that they could use me for taping the procedure, since I didn't move an inch and didn't even peak. He told me that he'll be in the hospital all night to which I answered "me too" :) I guess I was feeling better if I decided to joke.

I was told that things could slow down after the epi. They checked me around 6 and I was at 4cm. I was a little bit upset for not making more progress. The doctor and the nurse started talking about giving me Pitocin to move things along. They told us that our families could come around 5-6am and meet the baby not earlier. I was getting for a long night while Mr. V stepped out to the store to get himself diner.

Around 11pm, they said my doctor wanted to deliver my baby (it made me feel great that as busy as that woman is, she wanted to be there for us), so they decided on not giving me Pitocin and wait till morning when Dr. G would come in. They checked me again around that time and I was 6cm dilated.

We got a new nurse after 11pm, she wasn't very talkative but she was still answering our questions and doing her job. At 1am, she came in and checked me. I couldn't read her face. I thought she was going to say that I was still at 6cm and not making any progress. She looked at the monitor and then said that I was at 10cm and ready to push. Wow, really? What a reality check it was for me. I started shacking uncontrollably and my fever went up to 38 degrees. She prepared the room and got everything ready for the baby. Then we did couple of practice pushes. Mr. V was holding one leg and the nurse was holding the other. I didn't know if I pushing or not, since I couldn't feel anything. But after couple of pushes the nurse called the doctor and told her we were ready for her. Everything was happening so fast that I couldn't believe I was about to meet my baby girl. We had to wait for the doctor for about 20 minutes, she was finishing up a c-section. After she came in, we did another couple of pushes (three at a time) and my baby girl was born. Mr. V cut the cord and they placed her on me (now originally I wanted them to clean her first, but at that point I just wanted to see her).

She was absolutely perfect and the most beautiful baby. She was very clean when she came out even Mr. V didn't expect her to be that way. She cried for couple of minutes on my chest while I looked at her and cried. The nurse took her then to clean, measure, and weight her.

Mr. V had time to call my parents and his brother before we started pushing. They wanted to be at the hospital at any time night or day to meet our baby girl. It was great to see my parents and to know that my BIL and SIL were there too and on time (they are always late) :)Our room was filled with joy and laughter as everyone was looking at Ariela.

Ariela was born at 2:14am, weighted 7lb 6oz and was 19.5 inches. We came home after spending two nights at the hospital and were learning from each other ever since.